Joe and I loved each other for fifteen years. We went from high school sweethearts to husband and wife. Then, he got cancer. Before he died, he told me he didn't want any regrets. He said he had fallen in love with someone else. He wanted to spend his remaining time happily with that girl. But after he died, his soul was trapped beside me. And I could still see him. 01 Joe had cancer. Stage four. I was right there when the doctor dropped the hammer. I listened in disbelief, then immediately started asking about second opinions, experimental trials—anything. Joe just sat in the chair, expressionless. His head was tilted down. I couldn't see his face. I couldn't tell what he was feeling right then. 02 Joe lost a lot of weight. He was in the hospital for about a week, going through a battery of tests and treatments. I squeezed out time every day to be with him. Mostly, I just saw him staring blankly out the window. Or staring blankly at his phone. I didn't know what he was thinking. But I knew that for someone facing their own mortality, their mood couldn't be good. Swallowing the bitterness in my heart, I chattered about trivial daily stuff. All while opening the takeout I'd brought him. 03 Occasionally, Joe would look at me with guilt in his eyes. Like he wanted to say something, but stopped himself. I didn't know what was on his mind. But whenever I looked back, ready to ask him what was wrong, he would lower his head again. As if escaping. He was always expressionless. But the look on his face was way more complicated than before. 04 Later, I found out why. I don't know how many times I'd visited the hospital ward by then. But that day, I saw her. That girl, Shelby. In front of her, Joe showed a smile I hadn't seen in days. That relaxed, happy look. In a daze, I realized it seemed like ages since I'd seen it on Joe's face. 05 Joe and I met when we were teenagers. We got to know each other. We fell in love. This year was our fifteenth year together. Our sixth year married. We long ago lost that initial passionate spark. We settled into a calm, gentle rhythm. Sometimes, I could feel that Joe didn't like me as much anymore. Actually, it was mutual. I didn't have that initial girlish crush on him either. But we still had years of friendship. I thought we would never end up in an ugly mess like other couples. Affairs. Mistresses. Illegitimate kids. Divorce. I never thought there would come a day when I realized I'd judged a person wrong. 06 Right in front of me, in his hospital bed, Joe took that girl's hand. They interlocked fingers. My mind went blank. Those eyes I used to love so much stared at me with guilt. But also with an unusual firmness. Joe was thin, his face pale. He was good-looking, so even his sickly appearance didn't make him look bad. Seeing no reaction from me, Joe spoke again. "Chloe, I'm dying. I don't have much time left in this world. I don't want to have regrets." When he said he didn't want regrets, he meant one thing. He wanted me to bless his affair with the girl beside him—Shelby. 07 The first time I knew of her existence was at Joe's tech company. Shelby was the new marketing intern. When I arrived, Joe was still in a meeting, so I waited in his office. While I was waiting, Shelby barged in. We both froze. I felt something was off right away. The CEO's office wasn't exactly a place regular employees could just wander into. Let alone a lowly intern. But this Shelby girl was slick. Her ability to handle situations and adapt was way beyond your average intern. 08 Later, Joe explained to me that Shelby was a junior at our old university. When he went back to give a lecture at alumni weekend, she was there. She interacted with him the most during the Q&A. She asked for his autograph afterward. "The young girl was new to the corporate world," he said. "Inevitably a bit brash, but her work skills were strong." Listening to him, I vaguely recalled something. Joe and I went to a big state school. We were supposed to go to that alumni weekend together. But I had a last-minute business trip and couldn't make it. Thinking back now... Maybe Joe's change of heart started right then. 09 I was silent for a moment. Shelby gripped Joe's hand. She tilted her head slightly so I could clearly see her tear-filled eyes. And the dried tear tracks on her face. She said, "Chloe, Joe and I have had feelings for each other for a long time. But out of respect for you, neither of us crossed the line. "If it weren't for Joe... I wouldn't be making such an excessive request. "I know being the other woman is shameful. "But I love Joe. I want to happily spend his remaining time with him. "You love him too, so you should want him to be happy, right? "Do you want to see Joe spend his last days depressed? Leaving this world with regrets? "You've already had half his life. "Why can't you let us have this last little bit of time?" 10 I looked at Shelby's contrived posturing. Then at Joe's silent indulgence. A sense of unfamiliarity and absurdity rose in my heart. For a split second, I felt like our passionate youth was just my own over-romanticized fantasy. Maybe the Joe who loved me so deeply back then never even existed. 11 I clenched my hands tightly. The pain in my palms brought my reason back. I forced myself to calm down. "So what do you mean? You want me to divorce him so you two can be together?" Shelby was about to speak. But the hand interlocking fingers with hers squeezed hard. She let out a small cry of pain. She glared coquettishly at him. But Joe didn't gently coax her or indulge her like usual. She instantly knew this wasn't the time to make a scene. Shelby was smart. Especially at reading men. That's how she captured Joe's heart so quickly.
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