On New Year's Eve, my husband and I got into a massive fight over his sister-in-law. The reason? His sister-in-law bought his mom a thick gold necklace, while I, the younger daughter-in-law, showed up empty-handed. My husband felt I embarrassed him in front of his family. I didn't hold back. One sentence from me—"You didn't pay a dowry, so why should I pay for gifts?"—made him completely lose his mind. Chapter 1 My husband, Chris, was my college sweetheart. When we started talking marriage, my parents asked for a traditional dowry of $18,000 to help with the wedding costs and future security. Chris immediately balked. "I'm not giving your family $18,000. That's selling a daughter, not a marriage." "I don't have that kind of money, and I won't ask my parents for their retirement savings. That would be unfilial. If you really want it, I'll take out a loan, and we can pay it back together." He lectured me about financial independence and not leaching off our parents. He painted a picture of noble poverty. Finally, he proposed a "perfect" solution: The 50/50 Marriage. No dowry, no bride price, split expenses, split housework. At the time, I thought he was just being practical and independent. Like an idiot, I agreed. At first, things were fine. We kept our finances separate and split the chores. But a few months later, the cracks started to show. It started with my mom's birthday. I casually asked him what gift we should get her. That simple question triggered an explosion. "Lily, did you forget? We have a 50/50 marriage! We agreed: each person handles their own parents. Now you're trying to get money out of me? Is your family that desperate? Always staring at my wallet!" His words were so ugly I turned red with anger. "Fine, don't buy anything! But why be so nasty? You married me; my parents are your parents too. Is it so hard for a son-in-law to show a little respect?" Honestly, I didn't fully understand his version of a "50/50 marriage." I thought it just meant we were equals. His accusations left me stunned. "A son-in-law can show respect, but only if I want to give it. You can't ask for it. Besides, in a 50/50 marriage, I don't owe your relatives anything. If I give, it's charity, not duty." Seeing my expression, he softened his tone slightly. "Sorry, I know that sounded harsh. But we agreed before the wedding. You can't break the rules." Seeing his self-righteous face, I finally realized something was wrong. "So you mean, in this marriage, I don't have to do anything for your parents either? No birthdays, no holidays?" "Of course. We manage our own families. I won't break the rules," he said, lifting his chin arrogantly. "Ha. Then why didn't you say anything on Mother's Day when I bought your mom clothes and supplements?" Chris flushed, embarrassed for a second, then argued back, "That was your choice. You're her daughter-in-law; it was a nice gesture." "And you're my mom's son-in-law! Where was your gesture?" I shouted, losing my temper. "I told you! I can give voluntarily, but you can't demand it! I was going to give something, but since you asked, now I won't. Figure out your mom's birthday yourself. I'm not going." He slammed the bedroom door. Chapter 2 I didn't beg him. On my mom's birthday, Chris didn't show up. Not even a text. To save face, I made up an excuse for him. After the relatives left, I told my parents everything. At first, I was calm. But as I spoke, the tears started falling. "Mom, Dad, I didn't know '50/50 marriage' meant this. I thought it just meant no dowry. When his family visited, I booked the hotel, paid for dinners, played tour guide... I never thought when it was my turn, he'd say 'I don't owe you anything.' That bastard..." I cursed him out, letting all my frustration go. I expected my parents to be furious. Instead, they were surprisingly calm. "Why cry? This is a good thing. Now you don't have to worry about buying gifts for your in-laws anymore. Let Chris handle his own family. It's fair." My parents were more open-minded than I thought. Their perspective cleared the fog in my brain. Chapter 3 After that, I changed. No more gifts for his family. No more holiday texts. I even left their family group chat. Chris noticed immediately. "Lily, why did you leave the group chat? How will my parents find you if they need something?" He rushed home from work, ready to fight. "Why would they need me? They can find you. We agreed: 50/50 marriage, no interference with in-laws. Besides, you're not in my family group chat either." Chris... He choked on his own logic. He stared at me for a long time, then stormed into the study to make a call. He never brought it up again. Ignoring his family was liberating. I cooked when I felt like it. When I didn't, I ordered takeout. One night, Chris came home and saw me eating spicy takeout fish. He frowned. "Takeout again? It's unhealthy. My doctor said my liver isn't great; I shouldn't eat greasy food. Can't you be more considerate?" "Then don't eat it. The kitchen is right there. Cook for yourself!" I rolled my eyes. Hearing me tell him to cook, Chris exploded. "I work hard all day! I have to cook when I get home? Can't you be like other wives? Handle the domestic stuff so I have a comfortable home to come back to?" Comfortable home? I scoffed. "Buddy, 'other wives' got a dowry and a wedding. They get provided for. You didn't pay a dime. This is a 50/50 marriage. You can't have your cake and eat it too." Chris turned green. Slam. He walked out. Chapter 4 We lived like roommates for months. Cold war. Until just before New Year's Eve, Chris broke. He sent me a WeChat red envelope with $520. I stared at the transfer. "What's this for?" We had been so strict with money for three months. My first thought wasn't joy, but suspicion. What did he want now? "My year-end bonus came in. Can't I give my wife a big red envelope?" He rolled his eyes, acting annoyed but clearly trying to bridge the gap. His confidence made me feel petty for doubting him. I blushed and accepted it. The ice began to melt. It felt like we were back to our dating days. But the peace didn't last long. A week later, the conflict returned. One night, half-asleep, Chris whispered in my ear. "Babe, come home with me for New Year's this year? Next year, I'll go to your parents'." He sounded so careful, afraid I'd refuse. Honestly, I didn't care. My parents lived nearby; I saw them all the time. But I hadn't planned on playing the good daughter-in-law after our fights. "Babe, I know we said 'separate holidays,' but it's your first year married. If you don't come, my parents will lose face in the village." He looked pathetic. I softened. "Fine. This year at yours. But next year at mine. And on the second day of New Year, I'm visiting my parents, and you have to come. No backing out." Chris nodded furiously, promising the moon. His hometown wasn't far, about an hour's drive. I packed light. Just a change of clothes. When Chris saw my single bag, his face fell. "That's it?" He walked around me. "Just one bag?" "Yeah? It's not far. What else do I need?" "Yesterday I saw you bought lobster, bird's nest, and expensive supplements. Where are they? Are you letting them rot here instead of bringing them to my parents?" Chapter 5 He was agitated. "Oh, those? My mom asked me to buy them for her. I dropped them off yesterday." I explained with a smile. I thought that would settle it. Instead, Chris looked even angrier. "What is your problem?" I frowned. "My problem? You have the nerve to ask? I told you a week ago we were going to my house. You didn't prepare anything for my family?" He started lecturing me. "You're married now. You need to detach from your original family and focus on our small family. Stop funneling everything back to your parents!" His lecture turned my face dark. So that $520 red envelope was bait. He expected me to use it to buy expensive gifts for his family. "You want to focus on 'our small family'? Then put some money on the table! We are AA (splitting costs), remember? You said 50/50 marriage means we aren't responsible for each other's relatives. Now that it's New Year's and you need to save face, the rules change? Who's the one being greedy? Damn it, even if I did buy those gifts for myself, I'd throw them in the river before giving them to you!" I was yelling now, cursing freely. Chris turned pale. He pointed a shaking finger at me. "You... you're talking about money again! Didn't I give you $520? Couldn't you use that to buy gifts?" "$520? To buy lobster, bird's nest, and supplements? Chris, are you living in 1920? Do you have no shame?" He choked, face flushing red. He clearly wanted to scream, but could only manage: "Well... you can't show up empty-handed! What do we do now?" He glared at me. I glared back. "How should I know? It's your house, not mine. You're the son; you didn't prepare. What can I, the daughter-in-law who got zero dowry, do?" Mentioning the dowry shut him up instantly.
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