After I died, the memorial service arranged by my best friend was trashed by a mob. Anti-fans swarmed the funeral home, livestreaming with selfie sticks. "Finally!" they cheered. "Good riddance!" The comments section was flooded with "Is she really dead? Thank God." My ex-husband was photographed on a mega-yacht, celebrating with his mistress for seven days straight. It seemed my early death was exactly what I deserved. Until one day, my diary was made public. Only then did the world realize... I had only been happy for one brief moment in my entire life. Chapter 1 On a live talk show, the host suddenly pivoted. "Ethan Blackwood, your ex-wife recently passed away due to illness. How do you feel about it?" Ethan scoffed. "Feel? Nothing. I heard her memorial got trashed. Good. She deserved it." The host smiled politely. "Do you mind talking about her? She's been trending since the news broke." Usually, capitalizing on someone's death gets you cancelled. But when the deceased is me, nobody cares. "Ask whatever you want," Ethan said, leaning back. "I'm curious," the host continued. "Everyone says Hazel Green was a monster. So, why did you marry her?" The movie star went silent. He probably couldn't remember why either. The host smiled faintly. "We actually obtained Miss Green's diary. Would you mind if we shared it with the audience?" Ethan sneered. "She dropped out of high school. Could she even write a diary? Go ahead, show it. I don't care." When the worn notebook was opened on screen, everyone froze. The handwriting was neat and elegant, not the scrawl of a madwoman. The host cleared her throat. "Let me read an entry." Chapter 2 October 3, 2020 Today, I'm getting married! Who's the groom? My Ethan, of course. Who else would I marry? Who else would he dare marry? If he looked at anyone else, I'd kill him. We've been together for six years. Today, I finally married the boy I fell in love with at eighteen. Dear Diary, you should have seen how nervous Ethan was putting the ring on my finger. His ears were burning red, and his eyes welled up instantly. They say men's tears are a woman's weakness. It's true. I couldn't stop smiling. But honestly, Diary, when Ethan got drunk later and collapsed into my arms, I cried even harder than him. He whispered in my ear, "Hazel, I love you. I love you so much. Thank you for being my wife." Actually, I should be thanking him. Because of him, I finally belong somewhere. At the wedding, Ethan's mom hugged me. My nose stung when she held me. It was the first time an elder had ever hugged me. So this is what a mother feels like. Growing up in the foster system, I didn't know what a hug was. Orphans like us, no matter how good we were, nobody held us. When we cried, we just lay on the floor until we stopped. Teachers always said we were "well-behaved." But it was only because we knew crying got no response. And being good got no love. So we learned to hide. Only after meeting Ethan did I learn to be myself. To believe he would love me anyway. Now, Ethan and I finally have a home. Even if we're broke. It will get better. I told Ethan, "This is the happiest moment of my life." He hugged me tight. "Not the happiest. Every day from now on will be happy." Marriage is wonderful. I have someone. I have a family. I'm not alone anymore. Here's a photo from the wedding. It's small, just a 4x6. I'm wearing an $80 dress from Shein, and Ethan is wearing his only decent suit. We look poor, but our smiles are so sweet. Ethan promised me that when he makes it big, he'll take me to the beaches of Malaysia for a real photoshoot. The host finished reading and took a deep breath. No one expected the "evil" Hazel Green to have such memories with Ethan. The words were playful and sweet. Anyone could see how happy I was back then. Expired sugar is the deadliest poison. Ethan froze for three seconds. These memories had been buried deep. Back then, marrying me felt like winning the lottery for him. He had forgotten. The netizens were confused too. This didn't match the villainess image they knew. "Reading this... she sounds like a normal girl in love." "Fake. Look at the handwriting. No way Hazel wrote that." "Wait, she was an orphan? No wonder she had no manners." The host looked at Ethan. "Mr. Blackwood, it seems you were very happy when you got married." Ethan zoned out for a second, then laughed self-deprecatingly. "She used to be a decent person. Too bad people change." The host smiled. "Perhaps. Let's look at the next page. Honestly, I'm curious what turned Miss Green into the villain everyone hates." Chapter 3 January 6, 2021 Dear Diary, sorry I ignored you. I've been busy with extra gigs. Today I'm complaining again. Is there any way to make quick money? Maybe I should spend $2 a day on lottery tickets? A meal on set is $2. If I skip dinner, I can save that money. Maybe I'll hit the jackpot. I don't want to rely on luck, Diary. But I need money so bad. I can't ask Ethan. He's already stressed. He films night shoots and edits videos during the day. He's so tired, but he always smiles and says, "Hubby isn't tired." It breaks my heart. Whatever. I'll figure it out myself. Attached photo: Ethan sleeping like an angel. When life gets hard, I just look at his face. The host paused. "Ethan, did you know your wife needed money this badly back then?" Ethan shook his head. "I was her husband. If she needed money and didn't tell me, it was probably for something shady. No wonder she did all those disgusting things later. For money, she really had no shame." The host sighed and continued reading. Chapter 4 January 10, 2021 Dear Diary. My best friend died today. We grew up in the foster home together for ten years. She left me just because we couldn't scrape together $5,000 for her surgery. I told her I'd find a way. Just wait a little longer. I'd deliver Uber Eats if I had to. But while I was on set as an extra, she pulled her own plug. She left a voice memo. "Hazel, we were thrown away as kids. Our bodies are weak. Making it to 25 is already a win for me. Don't be sad. Maybe in heaven I'll find the parents who dumped me and kick their asses. You and Ethan be happy. And remember, get your checkups. Poor people can't afford to get sick." I cried until I couldn't breathe. We were so close. If she just waited... Diary, why is the world so unfair? Today on set, I heard the lead actress's handbag cost $5,000. One bag could have saved my friend's life. Thinking about this reminds me of another friend from the home, Maya. She had a round face and a smile like the moon. She was adopted at eight by a rich family. I was so happy for her. But she came back a year later. Thin. Silent. Mute. She wrote down that the family abused her. To stop her from talking, they cut her tongue. I ran to the Director for help, but he beat me half to death. He took hush money from the family and buried it. Maya killed herself shortly after. Now my other friend is gone too. There aren't many of us left from the old days. Diary, I want to tell Ethan all this. But seeing his tired smile... Forget it. I'll wait until life gets better. I won't burden him. Goodnight, Diary. Hope I get a callback tomorrow. The host's voice trembled. Netizens reacted: "She needed money for a friend?" "What kind of foster home was that? Investigate immediately!" "Seems like a whitewash attempt. But you can tell she was jealous. Comparing a life to a handbag? Classic envy." The host turned to Ethan. "Ethan, did you know she needed $5,000? You were both 25. Did you really not have $5,000 in savings?" Ethan's pupils shrank. "In 2020, we saved $10,000 together. I promised to buy her a gold bracelet... But at the end of the year, my mom got sick. It took all our savings. Later, she never brought it up, so I never bought it." His voice dropped to a whisper. The comments flew by. "So Hazel gave all her savings to cure her mother-in-law and ended up broke herself?" "Well, marriage means family. It's expected." "If she had that bracelet, maybe she could have sold it." Ethan didn't tell the whole story. His mom had insurance. It covered most of the bills. When the reimbursement check came, I didn't see a dime. When my friend got sick, I hesitated, then asked my mother-in-law for a loan. She mocked me. "Marrying a useless thing like you was charity enough. You dare ask for money? You're an orphan. Nobody has your back." I froze. The woman who hugged me at the wedding and called me "daughter" looked at me with pure disdain. We didn't have a wedding ceremony, just a dinner. No ring, no dowry. And in the end, no respect. I learned then: once you're married, the masks come off. Especially when you have no family to defend you. My diary didn't hold half the grievances I swallowed. Chapter 5 The host smiled bitterly. "So, Hazel was broke because she gave everything to your mother?" The question was sharp. Netizens started arguing. Some sensed something was wrong. Ethan stiffened, adjusting his tie. "If she... hadn't done those disgusting things later, I would have made it up to her." He sounded self-righteous, his voice rising. The host laughed softly. "Is that so? Let's read on. Let's see how Hazel 'changed.'"
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