In the seventh year of my relationship with Julian Vance, the new drama he starred in exploded overnight. The Shippers of him and the heroine invaded the comment section of my, an amateur girlfriend's Instagram: "Hurry up and give Julian to someone more suitable." "The one not loved is the third party, sister you are really superfluous." "If you don't break up, we will scold you until you do." I was so angry I wanted to delete my account. Julian laughed at me for making a fuss, "They just haven't moved on from the drama." Later, at every promotional event for the new drama, Julian and the heroine would look at each other and shed tears. When the host asked about feelings, the heroine cried and said: "The order of appearance in life is really important." Julian sighed, raised his hand and touched her head. That night I proposed a breakup. Julian frowned and explained to me, "She just hasn't moved on." "Mm." "I didn't cheat." "Okay." He didn't understand, "Then why break up?" I smiled, "Julian Vance, I just suddenly feel it's meaningless, thoroughly meaningless." Chapter 1 Julian seemed not to hear me clearly. After a moment of silence, he said lightly: "I want to hear the real reason." I shrugged, "This is it." He stared into my eyes, thinking he saw through my mind. "Layla, it's nothing more than because of what happened during the day, you started being suspicious again, right?" Julian emphasized the word "again". Indeed, I used to suffer from gains and losses due to lack of security. Especially in the last two years, Julian's career was on the rise. Once he entered the set, he wouldn't reply to messages or answer calls. Where he was filming, who he partnered with, he never told me. Many times, I relied on scrolling Twitter, learning Julian's recent situation from paparazzi roadshows. In those videos, hugging, holding, kissing, were all common meals. I often watched and watched, uncontrollably imagining him being intimate with others, and then suffered insomnia. Maybe I was too petty. A few times I couldn't hold back, called over, and was coldly hung up by Julian. Next time we met, he always criticized me first time: "I said many times, I need to get into character, completely immerse in the script, can't be disturbed by outside people and things. "As a professional actor's girlfriend, you must understand me, support me, not cause trouble, understand?" Chapter 2 I have tried my best not to cause trouble. Only once, haven't seen for more than three months, I missed Julian too much. I inquired about the schedule in advance, confirmed he wasn't filming that day before going to visit. To bring his favorite pastries, I queued for three hours. Result caught up with heavy rain. The crew temporarily moved a heavy rain scene to that day. Because of my intrusion, Julian's kissing scene couldn't get into state, NG several times. He always treated people properly and thoughtfully, temper extremely good. Worried about causing trouble to everyone, kept apologizing. Only vented anger on me. Even threw the pastries I bought. "Layla, who let you come? Take your broken stuff, go!" My tears swirled in eye sockets. "Julian Vance, you bastard, you only know how to fierce me! "Seeing you busy, I immediately went to the lounge to wait, where exactly did I hinder you? "I don't want to date you anymore! Break up!" Hearing "break up" two words, Julian paused for two seconds. He clenched fists, restraining full anger. Pressed me on the chair to kiss, kissing and biting, fierce terribly. "Quarrel is quarrel, dare you casually mention break up later?" Today, Julian wanted to repeat the old trick. I stepped back. Let him pounce on empty air. Julian pinched his brow center, patiently continued to explain: "Tara is a newcomer, young, just can't get out of character for a while, is it wrong? "All colleagues, colleague cried I comfort a bit, is it wrong? "Can you not always suspect me, making me look like a scumbag, I have great mental pressure..." He chattered endlessly. I didn't listen to a word. Mind recalling the live broadcast during the day. After Julian and Tara looked at each other for a long time, both cried into tears. I don't understand. In the drama, the ending of male and female leads is happy and perfect. Outside drama, ratings soared all the way, receiving countless praises. What exactly are they crying for? Julian subconsciously wanted to help Tara wipe tears, hand raised halfway felt inappropriate, changed to touching head. A detail made Shippers edit countless videos. Caption: [Your tears are still on face, but I no longer have the identity to wipe them.] If before, I would be extremely jealous, let Julian coax me. But current me won't. Turns out when relationship reaches end, really like a pool of dead water, can't stir up waves. "You are not wrong okay, Julian Vance. "But today I just want to break up." Chapter 3 My stubbornness exhausted Julian's patience. He was in a hurry to catch a flight, no time to pull with me, only left a sentence: "You calm down yourself first." This is his most common way to solve problems between us. Just hands off and ignore. Next time meet again, two people kiss hug tired for a while, treat previous quarrel as never happened. With him, not mentioning means passed. But with me, every stroke is remembered. Few days later, I signed a shop transfer contract. "Miss Layla, I see your business usually very good, why not doing it?" I looked at the flower shop in front of me, still very reluctant. After all, poured my effort of several years here. "Because I am about to leave Los Angeles." Me and Julian are both from San Francisco. Back then he went north to build career, I quit job followed him to LA. At beginning we were very poor, lived in a ten square meter single room, monthly rent six hundred fifty, window only half above ground. Always passersby curiously peeking into window. LA so prosperous. And we were like rats living in gutter. Winter here cold to bone. I bought a second-hand heater, contact bad caught fire at midnight. Julian heard news, borrowed friend's car, drove seven hours night road back. He this person, put almost all emotions into acting. Usually treat people things lightly. But that time, he hugged me cried almost alkalosis. "Layla, is me useless, let you suffer with me. "I will be red, I will earn lots lots money later, love you cherish you whole life!" Seven years passed. Julian's career rose step by step, conflicts between us also more and more. No way. I am a person extremely anxious about intimate relationships. And Julian happens to be an actor. His job requires filming many intimate scenes, requires stuffing his soul into another identity, imagining loving others as the character in the play. Once he filmed an intense kissing scene with an actress. That part was exactly the famous scene where male and female leads emotional entanglement deepest. Two people both kissed to tears, uncontrollably hugged together kissed for long time, didn't even hear director shout cut. Finally both fell on bed, bodies sticking, tearing clothes. Those behind were not in script. Were subconscious reactions after true feelings revealed. Director couldn't stop applauding, "Good, this part added good, looks like really moved." Just so coincidence, that day was Julian's birthday, I specially brought gift to find him. Honestly speaking, seeing that scene, I was very uncomfortable. But no way. This is his job. Even I get angry, jealous, all appear unreasonable. Lack of security, made me anxious, sensitive, controlling desire bursting. While Julian showered, I secretly checked his phone. Discovered. He was very angry. "Layla, are you sick? Are you idle panic? Don't you have your own things to do?" Fatal three questions. Back then was him coaxed me quit job come LA, said just like me sticking to him, want raise me whole life. After that day, I took out all savings opened this flower shop. Come every day, wind rain not stop. Let myself busy. Then no time to tangle, Julian want kiss who today, intimate scene can shoot to what scale, will have physiological reaction, what if he really can't get out of character fall in love with others... Chapter 4 Already passed rush hour. Way home, subway empty. Two girls sat next to me, staring at phone, face hanging aunt smile. "Bet or not, Julian and Tara definitely moved heart outside drama too, this kind subconscious approach body movement can't fool people." "Doesn't Julian have girlfriend?" "Think about it, one side is girlfriend dated seven years, old pearl yellow no freshness, other side is fresh beautiful glamorous female star, if you are Julian, who you like?" I silently took out small mirror, looked at myself. I was at least prom queen back then. Not to point of old pearl yellow right. Actually Julian publicizing relationship was forced by me. At beginning, he said didn't hope bring too much personal life to screen to discuss. So that insiders didn't know he had girlfriend. There were chasing him, introducing objects to him. Even wanting unspoken rules him. I therefore threw a big temper, "Do you exactly think unnecessary, or think I can't be shown, don't want give up your single persona?" Julian scolded me unreasonable. But still announced my existence on Twitter: [Happy 7th Anniversary, Girlfriend @Layla] Late night, #JulianAnnounceRelationship and #JulianTara simultaneously on trending. Because their CP fans wrote a explosive post overnight—— [You are my madness wandering outside secular order.] Summarized all ambiguous interactions of two cooperating till now. In post, they two like hard fate mandarin ducks love but can't get, and I am the bully blocking their two-way rush. They said Julian only because responsibility, didn't choose break up with me such mediocre girlfriend. Tara online late night. Like, cancel, post saying hand slipped. All in one go. Even specially @me: [Sister-in-law don't mind, another day beautiful date meal together @Layla] As if very familiar with me. But I simply don't know her. Julian advised me don't overthink, "Tara very simple little girl, she just afraid you awkward." I subconsciously asked: "She simple, then me?" "You?" Julian hooked lip corner, "Alright Layla, compare what with young little girl." His tone carried doting. Clearly Tara only two years younger than me.
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