I was childhood friend Jax's simp for five years, but only ended up as a "friend with benefits." For five years, as long as he called, I appeared. Every time he needed comfort, I stayed. Even without a title, I was happy. Until I heard he had a new girlfriend, I quietly packed up my feelings, ready to exit again. But that night, he knocked on my door again. And rarely bought a box of strawberry flavored condoms. "This isn't appropriate, right? Aren't you dating?" I blocked the door, not letting him in. He squeezed in sideways, pulled open his collar, movements showing rare impatience. But his tone carried a trace of rare gentleness: "I am dating, but she is too clean, so innocent that people just want to protect her." He paused, voice lowering: "I can't bear to touch her. Can only come to you to solve it. Let's just treat it as a breakup sex. What are you pretending in front of me, open it quickly!" I swallowed the astringency in my throat, asking cooperatively: "Who is it, can make you treasure her so much?" The corner of his mouth hooked up a heartless smile, looking up at me: "Your sister." Chapter 1 Hearing this sentence, my hand trembled fiercely. The condom fell on the bed. Brain blank for a rare moment. I never thought he would be with my stepsister. Even less did I expect he would turn over a new leaf for my stepsister. Maybe the expression on my face was very helpless. Jax tutted, smiling playfully: "Didn't expect it?" He took a drag of his cigarette, as if reminiscing: "That little idiot, doesn't even know how to smoke." "I passed it to her with my mouth, she coughed for a long time." "Innocent as hell." He shook his head laughing. I swallowed the sourness in my chest, speaking with difficulty: "Why her?" Jax put out the cigarette in his hand, tone rarely serious: "Annie is a good girl, I don't want to let her down." My heart trembled, as if all strength was drained from my body. "Forget it, you continue to take pills tonight." Jax pushed me onto the bed, skillfully unbuttoning my bra. "Annie is too good, I held back for so long these days, dare not touch her." Still the usual flirting technique, but my body was cold and couldn't raise any interest. I pushed him away, stood up silently. Put on clothes, shoes. Then holding back the pain, pretending to be free and easy: "Jax, let's break it off." Jax paused slightly, tutted disapprovingly: "Nicole, can you leave me?" I didn't speak, picked up my bag and started packing cosmetics. "Fine, get out then." Jax's voice turned cold. With a bit of impatience of being disturbed. My fingertips almost sank into the flesh, but I still left the room. Jax can like anyone, but not Annie. Annie and I have completely different personalities. I love playing, love excitement. Like Jax, nature is flamboyant and loose. And Annie has been a well-behaved, obedient and quiet good girl since childhood. So when she was tricked by punks to the bar, I chose to save her. That day, I was drunk as mud by the punks, barely escaped with her. But she left drunk me at the bus stop because the teacher notified to hand in homework. Causing me to be taken back to the hotel by the punks chasing out. Years later, I still dare not recall that night. I scoff at chastity, but voluntary and forced are two different things. Afterwards, I dragged my body tortured for a night, weak and broken, and slapped Annie hard. But she cried aggrievedly, collapsing and accusing me: "You only care about yourself! If I can't hand in homework, I will be punished by the teacher!" Since then, I hated her extremely. And Jax knew all these. Chapter 2 I couldn't accept the fact that he was with Annie. Could only avoid paying attention to his updates. But on his birthday, he sent me an invitation as if nothing happened. Maybe I just wanted to see with my own eyes, or maybe I was just unwilling. I chose to go to the appointment. But when I pushed open the private room door, my heart still missed a beat. On the sofa, Jax pressed Annie against the backrest, kissing dominantly and fiercely. I even saw the veins bulging on the back of his hand due to exertion. People around were jeering, only my face was pale. For so many years, every time Jax was intimate with me, he watched me being confused and infatuated with ease. This is the first time seeing him losing control emotionally. Kiss ended, Annie's face flushed, leaning softly in his arms. Jax's Adam's apple rolled, tutted dotingly: "Why so innocent?" Just finished speaking, saw me. The smile on Jax's mouth stiffened imperceptibly. I didn't speak, face probably ugly white. Could only be pulled to join the game. However, the next round, the loser was Annie. Punishment content was pole dancing. Annie was always conservative, hearing this punishment turned pale instantly, looking at Jax for help. People around were full of excitement, jeering: "Brother Jax, can you bear this?" Jax couldn't bear it, so he lifted his chin at me lazily: "Annie is thin-skinned, can't dance this." "You go dance for her." Annie is thin-skinned, what about me? My heart seemed blocked by a stone, crushing me breathless. Could only endure the bitterness, mocking coldly: "Why play if you can't afford it?" Annie's face turned white again, she bit her lip, suddenly said: "Sister, do you still hold a grudge against me for causing you to be raped back then?" The word Rape was specifically emphasized by her. Hard not to hear clearly, people around instantly cast strange looks at me. My body stiffened slightly, didn't expect Annie to uncover my scar in public. Annie continued to accuse: "How long are you going to hold a grudge against me? Clearly I was forced too, you can't just care about yourself right?" "And you are so casual, what's the difference sleeping with one more or one less?" She sounded more and more aggrieved, as if I was the one being aggressive. The pain of being tortured that night surged again. I trembled with anger, losing control on the spot. When everyone was caught off guard, I raised the wine glass and poured it directly on her. "Ah!" Annie exclaimed, crying like pear blossoms in rain pouncing on Jax. I sneered sarcastically: "Annie, for so many years you are still as selfish as ever, back then I clearly went to save you..." "Enough." Jax interrupted me, voice indistinguishable joy or anger. He took off his clothes and draped them on Annie. Then looked at me, smile still romantic and rogue. Impatience in eyes was particularly dazzling: "Nicole, it's been so long." "Is it necessary to calculate like this?" My heart sank heavily, only feeling something broken. Chapter 3 When that happened back then, I wouldn't think I lost my innocence like in TV dramas, then seek death. But the colored eyes and rumors of people around still made me feel lost and helpless. The most painful time was being blocked by school punks at the gate asking if being raped felt good? At that time, everyone around was watching the show, only Jax. He rushed over like crazy fighting with that group of punks, smashing until unconscious but still holding on to block in front of me. That time, Jax broke an arm. Several punks were sent to the hospital for emergency rescue. And I, love grew wildly, filling the girl's heart. Later, during the most critical time of senior year, it was also Jax who resolutely transferred schools to accompany me through that difficult time. When lost, I once asked him in a low voice. Is it really my fault? Am I really dirty now? At that time, the boy laughed wantonly: "Dirty my ass, wait for that beast to come out I'll kill him!" Since then, I was like a moth flying into the fire named Jax. Even if hurt completely by his promiscuity and looseness. Still persistently refused to let go. But now, he asked me is it necessary to calculate like this? At this moment, I looked at the careless coldness in his eyes. Suddenly felt very boring. I don't know how I walked out of the private room. Maybe very awkward. I entangled with Jax for so many years, for him even stayed alone in this strange city. Now it's time to let go. I went to the company to resign, bought a ticket home desperately. After packing everything, I went to Jax's villa. Here stored many things belonging to me, now should all dissipate with those love and lust. However, after opening the door, I froze on the spot again. Living room was ambiguous, scattered clothes and condoms everywhere. One, two, three. Each one seemed to tell me the intensity of this affair. Bedroom even heard the girl's soft tune ambiguous sound, and man's muffled groan when passion intense. I blinked dry eyes, took a long time to suppress the surging pain in my heart. Maybe this time entangling with Jax is Annie whom I hate to the bone. So clearly something I should have been used to, I still felt heart-wrenching pain. A moment later, the door opened. Annie exclaimed, covering her naked body: "Why are you here!?" I restrained myself from noticing the marks of intense ambiguity on her body. But just then, phone vibrated. I just wanted to check but was snatched away by Annie. She bit her lip and questioned loudly: "Are you secretly taking my nude photos!?" I felt she was unreasonable, sneered sarcastically: "Is it necessary?" Annie seemed stimulated by something, directly slapped me hard. "You just want to ruin my reputation, make me a dirty woman like you!" I was beaten to turn my head, cheek burning with pain. But couldn't understand no matter what. If not for me, Annie would have become the dirty woman in her mouth long ago. Why does she treat me like this? Chapter 4 I snatched the phone, then raised my hand planning to slap back hard. After all, I was never one to be bullied. But the next second, wrist was pinched tightly. Jax's voice mixed with coldness sounded. "Nicole, what crazy fit are you throwing?" Annie cried and threw herself into his arms, as if extremely scared: "Brother Jax, sister took my nude photos. I'm so scared, can you make her delete them?" Jax frowned tight, coldly said: "Delete." I only felt the pain on my face getting worse, unbearable pain. Jax actually also thought I would do such a thing. I gritted my teeth, holding back tears: "Let go." "Nicole, Annie is different from you." "She is not a casual girl, using such dirty means on her, do you want to ruin her?" Jax's tone even carried cold threat: "Delete now, or don't force me to be rude to you!" Every word of his stepped precisely on my pain. Emotions in my heart exploded completely, threw the phone hard on Jax's face. Red-eyed shouting: "Jax, look clearly!" "For so many years, if I wanted to revenge her, I would have done it long ago!" Jax looked at my collapsed appearance, face changed slightly. He opened the phone to look, nothing. And Annie had no trace of guilt. She leaned in Jax's arms, crying aggrievedly: "Brother Jax, I didn't mean to misunderstand her." "I just don't want to become dirty like her." "If people know I have premarital sex, I would want to die!" "Brother Jax, I'm really scared." Jax rubbed her head, seeming unable to handle her crying. My mouth hooked a sneer, took the phone and turned to leave. After a while, like comforting. Jax said: "Good girl, you are different from her." "You are not dirty." My body stiffened, finally completely gave up hope. Only felt past events, all turned into dreamlike broken shadows at this moment. Those years of obsession, all turned to ashes. Sitting on the high-speed train home. I looked outside the car, eyes unexpectedly calm. Leaving this city, Jax and I are completely over. I am not nowhere to go. At least, in my hometown. My long-dead mother left me a house belonging to me. I closed my eyes, planning to rest briefly. However, the next second, someone patted my shoulder. Man wearing white shirt, gold-rimmed glasses. Looking gentle, smile shy: "Hello, can I sit next to you?" I nodded lightly, continued to close eyes. A moment later, man said again: "Maybe a bit presumptuous, but I just took a photo of you." "Can I get your authorization?" Man called Jasper, profession photographer. Usual work is shooting scenery around the world. In the photo he handed me, I leaned against the window, side face bathed in sunlight, brows relaxed. I was a bit surprised, decided to leave Jax. My mood turned out to be relaxed? "Composition of this photo is perfect, removing your profile would destroy the overall structure." Man seemed a bit shy, pursed lips after saying this. "If you are unwilling, I will delete immediately." I smiled: "Use it." Maybe sitting in adjacent seats, or maybe too bored. Jasper and I chatted all the way. Then learned he and I lived in the same community. More surprisingly, he and I went to the same kindergarten. "Like this, counts as old classmates." Jasper also smiled: "I have a younger brother, always lived with my dad in this community. Don't know if you know him, his name is Jax." I froze, unbelievable there is such a coincidence in the world. Jax has a biological brother. Smarter than him since childhood, more sensible than him. So when parents divorced, Jax's mother only took the brother away. This matter has always been Jax's knot. But such a coincidence, I couldn't raise half interest. Still smiled: "Know, but not familiar." Speaking here, phone rang. It was Jax.
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