In the tenth year of Blake Sterling conquering me, he was hooked into bed by Vivian. The girl was soft and tender, in her early twenties, the age of passion, charming the man so much he didn't get out of bed for three days. I barged into the wedding room I decorated myself. Messy lingerie, the smell of sex, everything made me gag. But he just blew a smoke ring, hugging the woman covered in red marks into his arms. "If you can't stand it, get out. I'll find someone to clean up!" My eyes were red, hysterical. He said nothing, making me look like a lunatic. The next day, he requested the System. "I want to pause the conquering relationship with Elena. Just for one year. I want to use this year to give Vivian a grand wedding." But he didn't know, once the relationship is terminated, my ten years of feelings for him will also be wiped clean. Chapter 1 When I met Blake, we were both only eighteen, first awakening of love. He promised to hold a grand wedding before twenty-eight. At that time, we both took it for granted that the protagonist of the wedding must be me. But ten years later, things have changed. The System asked mechanically. [Does the conquered agree to terminate the relationship? Once terminated, all feelings will be zeroed!] My eyes felt hot, hand scalded by oil in the hot pan, forming a blister. "Is breakfast ready? Dawdling..." Blake was urging, because his little secretary had arrived at her workstation, waiting for the loving breakfast he made personally. But how could the busy CEO Blake have time? I, the official girlfriend, actually became their love helper. I was a bit resentful, tears smashing on the floor. A spatula cut the fried egg into pieces, turned off the fire, poured water, slammed the kitchen door. The man in the living room holding a jewelry box froze, frowning at me. "What crazy fit are you throwing!" My throat was dry, after a long time spat out a sentence: "I got burned." He threw down the thing in his hand impatiently, perfunctory stepped forward. "Such a small injury, are you being pretentious!" Saying took out burn ointment from the drawer, movements carried irritability. I watched his swirling fingertips, suddenly remembering the video sent by my best friend. Vivian frowned in pain from drawing blood, he was distressed to tears, ignoring everyone's eyes, kissing and comforting in public. And my casual sentence of grievance, in his eyes, has become a burden. "Alright! Don't make breakfast if you don't want to, don't use hurting yourself to gain sympathy. Elena, I'm very busy!" I lowered my head and pursed my lips. Busy caring about Vivian's period time, busy discussing wedding details, busy transferring most assets before I find out. Indeed very busy. Door slam sounded, air still had Vivian's perfume smell. Blake's phone on the table rang once. I looked up, the three words "Silly Girl" in WeChat remark were like thorns piercing my heart. He found it troublesome, never gave me a remark. Once I changed my screen name, he didn't message me for three days. When I lost my temper, he replied as a matter of course: "You changed your name, I couldn't find you!" At that time I loved him miserably, really blamed everything on myself, fawning to apologize. From then on, one name and avatar used for many years. But now it seems, his bottom line is only set for me. Phone rang again. Ghost-driven, I picked it up. Password easy to guess, Vivian's birthday. Used to be mine, later changed to hers. Blake's habit of loving someone is the same. [Pig head! Are you here yet? I'm going to be flat from hunger!] Three angry emojis in a row. [Also, tell Elena not to bake the bread too long! It hurts my throat eating it!] She added a sentence, but my eyes felt hot. Trembling hands, I scrolled up. Vivian's every complaint and grumbling had a reply. Today weather bad, Blake replied, good to have me loving you. Met a cute cat downstairs, Blake replied, how cute, cuter than you? Those simple love words, to me, are fantasy. After all, now his replying to messages is charity to me. System saw me silent for a long time, only caring about shedding tears, urged again. [Does the conquered agree to terminate relationship, once...] "Agree!" I replied firmly. Such days, I'm too tired living them. I don't want to consider Blake in everything anymore, even angry have to consider his time. Don't want to be the cheap skin who can't keep a man but shamelessly won't leave in others' mouths. Even less want to be the reluctant belonging after Blake played enough. Clearly he conquered me, finally I lived like a simp. [Conquered agreed, all feelings will be cleared within seven days.] My heart ached, fell to the ground. Door opening sound, Blake grabbed phone on table. Gaze landed on emoji, smiled sweetly, but didn't spare a glance at curled me. When woke up again, sky was dark. I looked up at the photo in the corner, actually not much fluctuation. Fried egg in pot soaked swollen, just like my relationship with Blake, unrecognizable. Chapter 2 First day knowing Blake, a System appeared in my brain. It told me, the boy in front trembling with nervousness to speak, wants to conquer me successfully. I didn't understand, asked what conquer means. [Conquer, means make you fall in love with him!] System's reply scared me terribly, so I smashed the Caramel Apple handed by the boy on the ground, fleeing in panic. Mom fell in love with Dad, but finally beaten by domestic violence breaking three ribs. I just want to live safely, loving someone is too dangerous for me. But Blake tried his best to resolve all my concerns. Parents divorcing, he kicked open the door taking me away from that suffocating home. Classmate bullying, he carried a stick single-handedly challenging a group of punks, beaten head bleeding. Later I was thrown to grandma's house in the countryside, almost married to an old bachelor, it was Blake driving a broken tricycle, taking me out of the deep mountains. So falling in love with him, seemed to become a matter of course. And he treated me well for years as one day. Three meals a day all housework contracted by him. He used meager salary to support us two. Pitted by black-hearted boss to penniless, only hid outside crying, never bringing any bad emotions to me. I became a little waste who can do nothing as long as Blake is there. Everyone said, Elena meeting Blake is luck of several lifetimes. I myself thought so deep inside. Until Vivian appeared. That time she was twenty-two, graduated from university, lively and bright, while Blake and I had stumbled to twenty-seven. We lost the agility of youth, all love hidden in thick clothes prepared for cold weather, a bowl of longevity noodles made personally on birthday. I thought plain warmth is happiness, but I forgot. When Blake and I first fell in love, we also loved vigorously. He started habitual business trips, forgot our anniversary. His bag had some cute sticky note dolls. I found them when packing, he threw them into the trash can disapprovingly, muttering irritably. "New little secretary really doesn't know rules, fire her tomorrow..." But Vivian still stayed by his side well for three years, and things thrown in trash can back then, were also picked up secretly by him in dead of night. Later his preference became more and more obvious. Bracelet he gave me on Valentine's Day was a free gift of Vivian's present. Company annual meeting lucky draw paid trip, he took Vivian without a word. Intimate photo posted on Moments [Little rascal insisted I post, I also learn young people recording life!] Tone doting, many mutual friends replying below. "Brother Blake not old at all, age gap fits best!" "She making noise he laughing, ship it!!" ... Only one comment stood out [This post blocked Elena right] Refresh three minutes later, I couldn't see that Moments anymore. Even for a period of time, he pulled me into blacklist, only let me out when needing me. I questioned, crying to choke. He only replied impatiently: "I'm very busy recently, Vivian asked me to block everyone unrelated to work, so efficiency can improve!" Looking at my red eyes, he sighed long, transferred $10,000 to me. "Is this compensation enough!" Door slam sounded, I paralyzed on sofa. Transfer message in phone burned my heart pain. Blake, being with you, when did I ever care about money. But a question fell in the empty home, no reply. Chapter 3 Three days later, I already forgot Blake frequently. Vivian added my WeChat unknown when, Moments full of wedding preparation looked like showing off. [Today Pig Head showed me the wedding dress he designed personally, really so beautiful] I looked at the picture, that wedding dress was Blake's graduation work once, product of when he and I loved most passionately. That wedding dress condensed with all our hearts, finally worn on mistress, simply ridiculous. I really laughed out, heart still densely pained, just not the heart-wrenching pain before. I couldn't help rejoicing there is System to control my emotions. But even so, those joys and sorrows Blake brought me in memory, still make me choke. A moment later, another Moments update popped up. [New wedding gift! Letting you become a husband, also become a father] Checkup picture clearly wrote, Vivian already pregnant three months. That barely formed fetus, like a hard slap on my face. Calmness exchanged by self-comfort collapsed instantly. Phone screen gripped tight by me, I trembled right hand, wanting to get closer, look clearly again carefully. But tears surged uncontrollably, I collapsed crying in blurred vision. No wonder! No wonder Blake suddenly requested to temporarily terminate conquering relationship, no wonder he transferred assets secretly. Stomach suddenly churned, I rushed to sink retching, but spat out nothing. Long time, looking at embarrassed self in mirror, face pale, hair sticking to face, swollen eyes no longer had former look. Why, why I suffer alone, but let them two dog couple happy. I picked up phone, without hesitation screenshot that Moments, sent to big group of mutual friends. [Congrats Mr. Blake, going to be a father.] Tone flat, but shocked group instantly quiet. I don't know how much waves that message stirred up, but I think, impact on Vivian is still big. Otherwise Blake wouldn't rush from company in half hour, anger soaring. "Elena what do you mean?" "You posted that photo in group how can Vivian face people! Girl's reputation so important, why are you so vicious!" He slapped broken our photo together. I looked at the man with hideous face, actually couldn't find a bit of former look in his eyes. "Don't most people in that group know your relationship?" "Still pretending what?" I picked up dropped photo, looked, felt annoyed, tore it into pieces in front of Blake. His surging anger stopped a moment, suddenly slapped away scraps in my hand. "What are you doing!" He glared at me, staring at me full of unreasonableness. "I will handle it well, why you have to make this scene!" My heart astringent pain severe. Is his handling giving the wedding promised to me to Vivian, or giving the wedding dress designed for me as token of love to mistress. I actually couldn't ask. Long time, I looked up, staring at him. "Do you still love me?" He froze, fingertips curled, hesitation flashed in eyes. I waved hand: "It's okay, not love then not love, I also soon, won't love you." Saying this sentence, I lowered eyes, pain in heart reached peak, tears balled in eyes, I took a sharp breath, didn't let it fall. "Elena, you are not twenty-year-old little girl anymore, throwing this temper, only makes me annoyed!" His tone cold and hard, as if determined I was just stubborn. He probably never knew, System agreed to his request, because I also agreed. Our relationship, he gave up personally first. I endured again and again, still slapped his side face. "I'm not twenty-something little girl anymore, then who did I give my twenty-year-old youth to!" "Gave to you this beast!" Voice hoarse, embarrassed to extreme. "Blake, from the moment you developed feelings for Vivian, we should have ended long ago!" He grabbed my wrist, eyes red, as if I was unforgivable. "I fished you out of mud pit, what qualification do you have to say end to me!" "Without me, you would have rotted in deep mountains long ago, birthed unknown how many kids with old bachelor!" His voice loud, piercing eardrums, also piercing the light flashing in his eyes when he saved me ten years ago. I stared wide eyes, looking at him in disbelief, tears rolling, close to losing voice. "What did you say?" He stumbled back a step, eyes dared not look at me. But he still stood there stubbornly: "Is what I said wrong?" I laughed hysterically, like a lunatic, smashed everything at hand. When I raised the clay doll Blake once made for me personally, he snatched it away. Heart on it already broken by wind and sun, just like this unspeakably painful relationship. "You want to smash this too?" I stiffened neck, even if tears flowed to eyes astringent, didn't bow head. "Good! Then smash it! Smash it clean!" He smashed doll hard on ground, fragments splashed, scratching my side face. "What exactly do you want me to do, I been with you ten years, am I not good to you?" "I just occasionally heart swayed a bit, every man does this!" He cried too, voice extremely aggrieved, as if I was the unforgivable person. "What about that child?" "Your heart swayed to Vivian's bed, still want me to forgive unconditionally?" My voice very light. Blake trembled, hand raised and put down, finally fled in panic. Last trace of affection remaining in my heart, dissipated clean.
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