The second year the Vance family adopted me, their biological daughter was born. They swore never to be biased. I spent a happy childhood. At eighteen, I was kidnapped into the deep mountains of Appalachia, suffered torture, escaped back deaf in both ears. Family's guilt all poured onto me, but ignored younger sister's stomach pain. Until she was terminal stomach cancer, last words were accusing parents of favoring me this outsider, not caring about biological daughter, next life absolutely not be Vance family member. Parents collapsed, drove me out of house. Only brother secretly took me in. I thought it was redemption. Until he ripped off my Hearing Aid time and again, sneering... "This bit of pain of yours, can it compare to half of Vivian's?" I collapsed and fled, but because couldn't hear car horn, was rolled under car. Open eyes again. I returned to the day I was just rescued from deep mountains back to Vance home. Chapter 1 In front of eyes was scene of parents holding me crying bitterly. Their tears smashed on my body, scalding hot. I stunned a moment, over them saw my appearance in vanity mirror opposite. Thin, dark, ugly. Arms covered with scars. Blood stains by ear spread to neck. Newly fitted hearing aid hard pressed into flesh, terrifying. I realized I was reborn. Reborn to this day just rescued from deep mountains back to Vance home. I dazed for a moment, then gently pushed away parents crying because of heartache for me. "I want be alone for a while." Two people stunned. Mother clutched my hand unwilling to let go. "Winter, Dad and Mom have to accompany you, how can you endure alone?" I shook head, pulled a very faint bitter smile. "But I want be quiet." Mother brows tight frown, tears fell more fierce. "Winter, you won't... won't think不开 (suicidal) right? You don't scare Mom." "How could it be." I said tone calm. "Hardly escaped death back, I won't give up this life." Father sighed. "Child needs space, let's give her." Two people walked away turning back every three steps, door gently closed. Instant, I slumped on carpet. Previous life me, cried whole three days after back. They then day night rotation guarded me, fed me, coaxed me sleep. But live again, their undisguised concern and grief at this moment, only let me think of their hideous look when letting me roll out of house. Any feeling is like mirror. Broken mirror can't be round again. I raised hand, fingertip very lightly touched hearing aid behind ear. A sharp pain immediately rushed up. This hearing aid was temporary fitted. Rough, not fit ear shape. I suddenly felt very unlucky, even rebirth time node not lucky. Have to go hospital, re-fit a suitable one. Hospital? I fierce remembered a thing. Used hand support wall, moved to Vivian's door. I have to remind her hurry go see stomach illness. Knocked door, no response inside. A servant aside happened pass, low voice said. "Miss Winter, Young Master took Second Miss to hospital see stomach pain afternoon, Second Miss kept shouting stomach pain..." I stood in place, hands feet bit by bit cold down. Julian Vance also reborn. Chapter 2 When Julian and Vivian returned from hospital, me and parents were eating. A small white paper box suddenly pushed to my hand side. Is Julian. His face no expression, voice also faint: "Passed dessert shop, bought Mont Blanc you liked before." Vivian immediately also took out a small box from bag, smilingly handed over. "Sister, I also brought for you! Is Soufflé Cheesecake, sweet, you eat mood definitely will be better! Forget all those bad things in past..." Father heavily coughed once, interrupted her. Mother worried look at me. Vivian like just reacted, covered mouth, eyes blinking. "Sorry Sister, I said wrong words..." Table quiet few seconds. Everyone careful, afraid which sentence stab me again. Previous life also like this, whole two years, family all careful. Gave all concern to me, but ignored Vivian. I smiled. "It's okay, all passed." Parents sighed relief. Vivian propped chin look me: "Sister you so amazing, walked out so fast." Previous life me, used two years then barely could not wake up in night. But crying grievance essence is a kind of acting spoiled. Only confirm self loved by other party, then dare show fragility. Current me, dare not. After all they don't love me. I changed topic: "Your stomach checked? Okay?" "Fine la!" She laughed. "Doctor said just chronic superficial gastritis, eat some medicine pay attention diet fine. Brother still insisted let me do full body checkup, result everything good, healthy very!" "That good." I nodded, continue bury head eat rice. But ignored opposite Julian fell on me more and more obscure gaze. Chapter 3 Back to room, I sat before desk dazing at computer screen. I don't understand why Julian active show good this life. If he also back with memory, then he should be like previous life, hate me to bone. After all in his eyes, Vivian's death, I can't escape relation. Did I judge wrong? He didn't reborn? However, no matter what, attitude he currently showed no obvious hostility. This temporarily counts a good thing. After all I want leave Vance family, still need his consent. Not only because he is brother, more because he is my professor. Although I eighteen this year, but already sophomore. I am math genius same famous as Julian. Back then also his discovery and guidance, I sixteen took down International Mathematical Olympiad gold medal, guaranteed admission to MIT Math Department. On screen is Rhodes Scholarship application final confirmation interface. Previous life because kidnapped, everything became bubble. This life, I won't give up. This is best chance I leave Vance family. I click "Accept". Next only need Julian final audit pass in background. He has no reason refuse. My grades and papers all qualified, he refuse me need write refusal reason to college approval. And he, always a person afraid trouble. Next few days, I started silently organize luggage to take away. But few days later at dinner table, Mom suddenly mentioned trip to Japan see cherry blossom. "Winter, go walk with Mom, okay? See flowers, mood will be broader." Time not conflict with study abroad, but I subconsciously shook head. "I won't go, you guys play well." Mom stunned, eye rims slowly red up. "Winter, what wrong with you? Mom always feel... always feel after you back, not close with us. Is it that thing... Mom help you find best psychiatrist see?" Dad sighed, smooth things over: "Child not want go don't force. Just this trip was specially arranged by Julian, I let him cancel." I looked at Julian. He was slow orderly using meal, heard words eyelashes didn't lift once. He always like this, emotion rarely exposed, but always carry a kind invisible oppression. Moment later, I heard my own voice. "Okay, I go." Chapter 4 Moment earthquake came, I didn't cry. I just felt, this is God's retribution to me. A child should grow up in orphanage, luckily adopted by Vance family, was eighteen years brocade clothes jade food Big Miss. This luck too full, like stolen. So, always have to return. Even go Japan see a cherry blossom, also have to encounter earthquake caused by volcano eruption. Outside is quarrel sound. Mom crying. "Two children I both want! I one also reluctant..." Dad roaring: "Rescue team said! Now can only save one first! Must choose within one minute, otherwise they go save others!" "No ah, I can't choose... can't choose ah..." "Then I choose!" Dad roared. "Save Vivian!" Mom cried loud. "Then Winter? If she pressed, never come out what do? If she has a three long two short..." Dad sighed: "She can only seek own luck! Vivian is our biological daughter ah, you can't give up own biological daughter!" Mom cried more severe, but didn't stop. Concrete above my head started loose. I knew, rescue personnel moving broken pieces above Vivian head. Due to some special structure, weight her side once moved, concrete above my head will whole collapse. I smile. Vivian, look, parents actually most biased is you. No matter surface how fair, inner heart still most love you. Crash—— Dust splash. Concrete fierce smashed down. Pfft. I fierce spit out a pool blood. Good news: Didn't hit head. Bad news: Pressed chest, I probably will be alive suffocated death. Breathing more and more difficult, head also more and more dizzy. In daze, my mind walked horse watch flowers. Parents said: "Little bastard! Hurry go, don't come back again!" Julian ripped off my hearing aid. Fresh blood flowed from ear. He just hooked cold sneer. "This bit pain of yours, compare half of Vivian?" Consciousness gradually dissipate. Just moment before completely fall into darkness, ear side came a burst quarrel again. "Julian! You just bandaged well, can't go down ah——" Heavy pressure on chest suddenly moved away. I fell into a trembling embrace. "Winter, don't sleep... talk with brother, okay?" I fight last bit strength, voice like gossamer: "Julian Vance... agree my study abroad application. I want leave you guys." Chapter 5 Hospitalized already half month. My leg smashed injured already can walk with crutch. Vivian came ward see me, handed me a small Buddha statue. "Sister, this I prayed for you, Buddha very effective." I smiled, gaze swept cross hanging on her neck. Don't know what happened, this period time she like possessed, everywhere pray god worship Buddha, even western god also believe. "Sister," she suddenly asked. "How brother suddenly back country not accompany you? I talk to him, he also ignore me, mood seems not good. Did you guys quarrel?" I shook head: "No." She sighed relief. "That good. I never saw you guys quarrel, and that time still brother risk death save you out." I lowered eyes, didn't take words. After wake up back then, Julian first sentence was: "You also reborn?" I very frankly admitted. I unable disguise enthusiasm to Vance family again, and he is reborn, sooner later will detect. He silent very long. I first time saw on him a kind expression approximate defeat. Long time, he said: "That time me and parents all rushed head by sadness..." "No need say." I interrupted him. "Live again one life, I who can understand." Stand in whose position, whose reaction all reasonable. Feeling sometimes just like this, love not enough, hate not up, just love hate intertwined. And I, just want leave that's all. Julian silent very long, then low voice said: "Then between us..." He didn't say full, but I understand. Actually feeling between us long surpassed ordinary siblings. Previous life after driven out Vance family, he took me in. In that small rental room, to comfort my emotion verge collapse, we did all absurd things. I thought that was love, later knew, that just part of his revenge. I said: "Absolutely impossible." Ward silent very long. Finally he said: "I will agree your study abroad application." "Later not want go home, I also will help you cover." After he left, never came back. I lay back sickbed, said to Vivian. "I want rest, you go out first." She somewhat reluctant, still nodded. Just moment she want close door, I called her, very seriously told her. "Parents most liked child, actually is you." She very cheerfully smiled, also bring bit shyness, gently closed door.
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