In the sixth year of secretly loving my childhood friend, he fell for my roommate. I acted as his wingman, listening to him pour out his love for her. All I got in return was his casual remark: "Chloe, please don't ever fall in love with me." At a party, he publicly confessed his feelings. My roommate's gaze swept over me with a hint of a smile: "I don't date guys who are entangled with other girls." Eyes from all around pricked me like needles. Ethan anxiously tried to explain: "Chloe and I are just..." I raised my hand, smiling as I showed off my promise ring. "I've had a boyfriend for a long time." 1 Vanessa went clubbing with someone else tonight. I scrolled through the fresh Instagram story she posted three minutes ago. Under the dim, ambiguous lights, she was sandwiched between a group of young, beautiful people. Still strikingly beautiful. Ethan sat on a bench by the campus lake. Looking as depressed as a puppy with drooping ears. "...I asked her out, but she said no..." "Then I saw her post this story tonight..." It was a bit chilly by the artificial lake at night. Couples walked past in twos and threes. I gave Ethan an annoyed look. "So? Is this why you dragged me out of the library?" Ethan looked up. He was born with good looks—almond eyes, thin lips, naturally looking like a flirt, yet stubbornly devoted. For twenty years, he only ever stumbled over Vanessa. The corners of his eyes were slightly red as he pounced on me for a hug: "Chloe, Chloe..." "I know you're the best to me... We've known each other for over ten years... You'll help me, right?" I stiffened all over. Ethan didn't notice, nuzzling like a big dog: "Please... Chloe." "..." I pushed him away with one hand. "Stop getting so touchy-feely." "Eh..." Ethan blinked, his almond eyes looking innocent: "We're friends." "Friends forever." 2 Friends, my foot. I had ulterior motives. Even rabbits don't eat the grass around their burrows. But I just had to fall for my childhood friend. Ethan and I have known each other since we were kids. Inseparable, childhood sweethearts. He clung to me, and I clung to him. As we grew up, the boy gradually stretched out and matured. Becoming more and more handsome, tall, and long-legged. Many girls in school chased him. Ethan had a flirtatious look, appearing like someone with a harem of girlfriends. In reality, except for me, he hadn't even held hands with another girl. Every time someone confessed to him, he would reject them with a smile. Call him innocent. Yet occasionally, this guy would say some incredible romantic lines. For example, when I asked him why he didn't accept girls' confessions. Ethan took a sip of his milk, resting his hand directly on my shoulder. The refreshing scent of his body wash mixed with the sweet smell of strawberry milk lingered around my nose. He grinned and said: "They're not as good as you, Chloe." "If I have to like someone, I'll just like you." I only remember my ears turning red then. Pretending to be calm, I told him to shut up. Actually, my heart was like shaken soda. Bubbling with joy, ready to explode in that instant. —I thought time was on my side. Long enough for me to stay by his side until he realized his feelings. But I didn't expect. He would fall in love at first sight with my roommate, Vanessa. 3 "Got it," I said. "I'll help you." Ethan's eyes immediately curved into crescents: "You're the best, Chloe." I pushed him away: "It's getting late, I'm going back to the dorm." "Okay!" Ethan obediently let go: "Get home safe." He didn't walk me back. The campus at night was much quieter than during the day. I walked slowly along the path, but was suddenly pulled into a corner. The cool, woody scent of the person invaded my senses, wrapping me in his jacket, his higher body temperature leaning over me in an instant. "Seeing my girlfriend hugging her roommate by the lake late at night." "Chloe, do you think I should post this on the campus confession wall?" Liam's voice was lazy, his warm breath brushing the top of my head. "Go ahead," I buried my face in his chest. Liam chuckled lightly, planting a kiss on my forehead: "Can't bear to." "So even if you cheat on me, I'll accept it." "Crazy," I pinched his waist. 4 Dating Liam was purely accidental. He was always a campus celebrity, and I had only met him a few times. Liam's looks were on par with Ethan's. But this guy felt too frivolous. Like a fox. His eyes seemed affectionate yet heartless. But somehow, even his heartlessness was charming. Acting as Ethan's wingman, I organized a group outing with Vanessa. Young men and women, drinking and playing games, the atmosphere heated up quickly. I drank a few glasses and went to the restroom to sober up. When I came back, the private room was empty. My stomach felt terrible. Squatting at the bar entrance, I called Ethan. Called seven or eight times, he didn't pick up. I messaged Vanessa. She replied quickly with a voice message: "Drank too much, craved BBQ from the south side, Ethan took me there." "Sorry, forgot to tell you." Her tone was casual, and in the background, I could hear Ethan's happy voice: "Vanessa, I lined up and got..." I was so angry I almost threw my phone. Looking up, I saw Liam leaning against the door watching me. Tall and long-legged, looking down at me with smiling fox eyes. "I..." "You're really pretty." Liam's eyes curved: "Want to date?" "..." I thought I must be drunk, otherwise I would have definitely gotten up to punch him. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe sadness, or maybe Liam was just too good-looking. "I have someone I like." "Doesn't matter." The young man's tone was smiling, his eyes captivating: "I don't mind." "...Fine then." I thought at the time. Let's just have some fun. 5 Then we "played" for three months. Existing in a weird but stable way. Kissing and hugging like a boyfriend and girlfriend, but neither seemed sincere. Liam liked my looks. I had someone else in my heart. The kind of situation where if posted on the confession wall, we'd be cursed as scumbags for two hundred comments. I admit I was cheap. The only thing in this world that can turn a person into a cheapskate, doing thankless tasks, is feelings. But if it were easy to let go. It wouldn't be called feelings. Liam walked me to the dorm building. I was wearing his jacket and tried to take it off to return it. He held my shoulders, smiling: "Give it back later, the stairwell is cold too." I didn't refuse. Liam kissed my cheek: "Free tomorrow?" I shook my head: "Tomorrow I'm being Ethan's wingman." The curve of Liam's lips deepened, his fingers pinching my cheek: "...Really not afraid I'll get jealous." He leaned down, using his height to impose a bit of pressure. Yet bit my cheek like a puppy: "Day after tomorrow, you're mine." "...Deal." Sometimes I felt Liam and I were freaks. Clearly not in love. Yet truly no different from loving couples. Because we didn't love. So we didn't fight. Instead, we were more stable. 6 Vanessa hurried back just before lights out. Glancing at the clothes hanging by my bed, she smiled ambiguously: "Went on a date?" "Yeah." I put my phone face down. On the screen was a pitiful emoji from Ethan. "With Ethan?" "No, with my boyfriend." Vanessa scoffed lightly, clearly not believing it. "Free tomorrow?" I spoke up: "Ethan said he found a lounge bar, very beautiful, goes well with that dress you bought." Vanessa put her bag on her desk, looked at me, eyes holding a bit of mockery and condescending pity: "You're pathetic, Chloe." I suppressed the irritation in my heart. "...Acting as a wingman for the guy you like, enduring my sarcasm." "Even making up a boyfriend... Say, does Ethan know?" Vanessa's eyes curved into crescents. Carrying a natural malice. But even so, she was damn beautiful. "Or maybe..." "Is this a tactic to get his attention?" "...Vanessa," my tone was a bit cold. Vanessa smiled: "Just kidding, why the rush." "I'll go."
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