1 My husband, Leo, was furious when he saw the Christmas gifts I’d bought for my trip home to my parents. "Every time you visit your parents, you shower them with gifts. You're spending way too much!" he snapped. "I make more money than you do! You earn less but spend more. It’s not fair. From now on, we’re splitting our finances. Fifty-fifty." I didn’t argue. I just agreed and set a few ground rules. From now on, we’d have separate bedrooms. We’d each support our own parents. And if he wanted me to cook or do housework, he’d have to pay for my services. A year later, my husband, now living paycheck to paycheck, was on his knees, begging me to take him back and tear up our agreement. I just smiled and handed him the divorce papers. “I think we’re better off making a clean break.” … Leo stared at the pile of beautifully wrapped gifts by the door, his brow furrowed in a deep, angry line. “Did you really need to buy all this just to visit your family?” he demanded, his tone dripping with accusation. It set my teeth on edge. Still, I managed to keep my voice even. “It’s two identical sets of gifts. One for my family, one for yours. Everything is exactly the same.” In our three years of marriage, I had never once favored my family over his. I’d always been meticulously fair. But even my painstaking efforts to keep the peace weren’t enough for Leo. He shot me a look of pure contempt. “I pull in over seven grand a month after taxes, and you’re bringing home, what, five? On what planet does your family deserve the same treatment as mine?” he sneered. “Why should my higher earnings be used to average things out? You earn less, but you spend more. Tell me how that’s fair.” His words were a punch to the gut, stealing the air from my lungs. All this for a few Christmas presents? Did he really need to blow this so far out of proportion, turning our home into a corporate boardroom where our love was measured by income brackets? Seeing my silence, Leo pressed his advantage. “My mom has mentioned this a few times, you know. I didn’t pay much attention, but now I see her point. You really are clueless when it comes to managing money.” “So, here’s what we’re going to do,” he declared, a triumphant gleam in his eye. “To make things fair and square, we’re splitting everything from now on. AA. You can spend your salary however you want, and I won’t say a word.” I stared at him, my heart sinking. Was this really the man I had shared a bed with for three years? It was clear this wasn’t a new idea. This resentment over household expenses had been festering for a long time, no doubt fanned into flame by my dear mother-in-law. Without a moment’s hesitation, I gave him a crisp nod. “Fine. We’ll split it. But if we’re doing this, we’re laying down some ground rules. Let’s get everything crystal clear.” Leo, clearly expecting a fight, was visibly thrilled by my quick agreement. He nodded eagerly, like a bobblehead. “Yes, yes! Let’s get it all in writing. That way, there are no hard feelings.” Hard feelings? I thought with a bitter laugh. You’re getting worked up over a few daily expenses? I calmly laid out my terms. “Starting today, we have separate bedrooms. Utilities and property taxes are split down the middle. We each support our own parents.” I leaned back, my voice taking on a steely edge. “You can wash your own socks and underwear from now on. If you want me to do your laundry or cook your meals, you’ll have to pay me for it.” “My cooking will follow my standards, at a rate of no less than $15 per person, per meal. And if you want me to handle all the housework, that’ll be an extra $500 a month.” I had barely finished my sentence before Leo shot to his feet. “Five hundred dollars? For a little housework?” he sputtered. I lounged back on the sofa, giving him a cool, dismissive glance. “A professional cleaning service would cost you at least eight hundred, probably more. The choice is yours. I’ll keep my own room tidy, but the rest of the house is on you.” “Or,” I continued, a smirk playing on my lips, “if you want to save money, you can do the dishes, sweep, and mop every day, and do a deep clean of the entire house once a week…” Before I could finish, Leo cut me off, his voice tight with irritation. “Fine! I’ll pay it! Happy now?” A triumphant smile spread across my face. You thought you could treat me like a free maid, did you? Let’s see how you like it when you have to actually pay for my labor. I pointed a finger at the gifts by the door. “I bought those with my salary. You can buy your own damn presents for your family.” 2 On Christmas Eve, we arrived at my in-laws' house for dinner completely empty-handed. Leo plopped down on the sofa and immediately started scrolling on his phone. I mirrored his posture, pulling out my own phone. My mother-in-law’s face instantly soured. “Getting more shameless by the day, are we?” she grumbled. “Showing up to your in-laws’ house on Christmas Eve empty-handed? Who do you think you are, a princess?” In the past, I would have immediately taken over the kitchen. On Christmas Eve, I’d be up at dawn, shopping for ingredients and cooking all day while the three of them—Leo, his mom, and his dad—sat around waiting to be served. But tonight, the kitchen was dark and silent, the stove cold. Were they still expecting me to perform? My father-in-law, a man with a notoriously short fuse, jumped right in. “Ava, look around! Do you know any other daughter-in-law who acts like you? Have you forgotten all basic decency?” he roared. “We used to think you were so considerate. Was that all an act? Now you can’t even be bothered to keep up appearances?” Watching them fume gave me a strange sense of satisfaction. I had poured my heart and soul into being a good daughter-in-law, and what had it gotten me? Nothing but criticism. Every gift I ever brought, my mother-in-law would find something to complain about. “This is so impractical. You have no idea how to run a household! Leo works so hard for his money, and it just breaks my heart to see you waste it like this!” “And your cleaning… you’re not even as good as a maid. I have no idea what Leo ever saw in you!” See? I was damned if I did, damned if I didn’t. So I decided I might as well be a freeloader. I let them rant until they ran out of steam, then I spoke, my voice cool and detached. “Dad, Mom, don’t look at me. Leo was the one who insisted we go fifty-fifty on everything. The deal was, we each support our own parents, and we each buy our own gifts.” I paused for effect. “We also agreed that if I do any housework, I get paid. So, for tonight’s Christmas Eve dinner… how much are you offering?” Last year, I’d wanted to have Christmas Eve dinner with my own parents, so I booked a table at a five-star hotel for both families. It should have been a joyous occasion. Instead, my in-laws ruined it. They spent the entire evening loudly boasting about how brilliant their son was, not-so-subtly implying that I was just leeching off him. They even criticized me for not being frugal enough, booking such an expensive dinner. Never mind the fact that my mother had already insisted on paying for the entire meal. Did they really need to make such a scene? But the worst part was when they started pressuring me about having children, right there at the dinner table. “Ava, dear, that little salary of yours requires you to work so much overtime. Is it really worth it? At the end of the day, this family relies on our Leo to provide,” my mother-in-law had said with a saccharine smile. “Since you don’t earn much anyway, why don’t you just quit? You could focus on getting your body ready for a baby and stay home to take care of Leo and the little one.” Every word was a thinly veiled insult, a reminder that my salary was less than Leo’s. I have my own two hands. I love my job. Why should I be the one to make such a sacrifice? What infuriated me most was Leo’s reaction. He actually agreed with them! “She’s right,” he’d chimed in. “Who pays for everything around here? The food, the bills, the mortgage… it’s all on me. It wouldn’t make a difference whether you worked or not.” His salary, just over seven thousand a month, had gone straight to his head. Did he really think his money was inexhaustible? Now, hearing that I expected to be paid for cooking dinner, my in-laws exploded. My mother-in-law, in particular, launched into a tirade that showered me in spittle. Leo, his face grim, leaned in and whispered, “Just cook the meal, Ava. I’ll pay you later. Do you really have to ruin Christmas Eve for everyone?” I remained on the sofa, unmoved. “We have an agreement. Payment first, then services rendered. No credit.” My mother-in-law looked ready to attack, but a cold glare from me stopped her in her tracks. “You’re always complaining about how much I spend, aren’t you?” I said calmly. “Why don’t you go to the market and see how much groceries cost on Christmas Eve?” “Since we’re splitting everything, you should be the ones paying for the food anyway.” You love putting on a show for everyone, don’t you? Let’s see how long you can keep up the act. 3 As was tradition, Leo’s grandparents, his uncle, and his family were all coming over for Christmas Eve dinner. I had deliberately said nothing about buying groceries. I was waiting for this exact moment of chaos. Otherwise, his family would just sit back and expect everything to be done for them. My mother-in-law’s voice rose to a shriek. “A big dinner for all these people? Do you know how much that will cost? It’s already late afternoon! All the markets are closing. Where are we supposed to buy food now?” Getting desperate, are we? I shrugged. “I assumed Leo had already told you. Since we’re splitting everything, what happens in this house is no longer my responsibility.” I’d never met parents like them, who just expected their children to provide everything without lifting a finger. Every time they knew we were coming, they prepared nothing. I never expected a hot meal waiting for me, but they literally wouldn’t even buy a single vegetable. Contrast that with my parents, who would always have a feast of my favorite dishes ready whenever I visited. And when I left, they’d load me up with bags of food to take home. The difference was stark, and it was heartbreaking. My mother-in-law was pacing like a caged animal, while I sat calmly on the sofa, playing a game on my phone. If I hadn’t seen the text messages between Leo and his mother two days ago, I wouldn’t have stooped to causing such a scene on a holiday. Leo: [Mom, it’s done! As of today, Ava and I are officially splitting everything. You don’t have to worry about her wasting my money anymore!] Mother-in-law: [Oh, my son, you finally grew a spine! I told you that woman was only after your money. Who knows how many nice things she’s secretly bought for her own family behind your back!] Leo: [I know, right? Thanks for the wake-up call, Mom. I never even calculated how much she’s taken advantage of me these past few years!] Mother-in-law: [With that pathetic salary of hers, what right does she have to buy her family the same things as ours? They don’t deserve it!] Reading those words, a hot rage had boiled up inside me. I’d forced it down, placed Leo’s phone back where I found it, and avoided a confrontation. I was saving it for Christmas Eve, to catch them completely off guard. It was now prime time for dinner prep, and there wasn’t so much as a single leaf of lettuce in the house. Leo couldn’t take it anymore. He grabbed my arm and pulled me out the door. The local market was deserted, so we had to try the supermarket. Everything was closed except for a high-end organic grocery store. I didn’t mind. I leisurely strolled the aisles, tossing all my favorite things into the cart. With every item I picked up, Leo’s face grew darker. “Do we really need that much? This is too expensive! Can’t we get something else?” Oh, so now that it’s your money, you’re feeling the pinch? I thought. For the past few years, I’d spent hundreds on groceries for this dinner, not to mention the imported fruits and desserts. Did anyone ever feel sorry for my wallet? I stopped the cart and turned to him with a placid smile. “It’s a Christmas Eve dinner for ten people. Are you suggesting we serve three dishes and a soup? I don’t mind, but it’s not my reputation on the line.” There was nothing cheap in this store. Even a couple of organic cucumbers cost a small fortune. I remembered the years I’d bought jumbo shrimp, king crab, and fresh sea bass for this meal. Not once did they ever mention the cost. In fact, my father-in-law had complained I hadn’t bought enough, watching as his family devoured everything like a pack of wolves who’d never seen meat before. I could have bought a truckload and it still wouldn’t have been enough. Leo, gritting his teeth, had no choice but to let me continue shopping. As we reached the checkout, I grabbed a pack of festive envelopes from a nearby display. “Don’t forget the Christmas gifts for your parents and grandparents. In previous years, my standard was a $300 cash gift for each of them.” “Oh, and your cousin’s kid,” I added brightly. “I usually gave him $100. Just so you know.” As the words left my mouth, Leo’s face fell, looking like he’d just been handed a death sentence.
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