The day my wife gave birth to my brother’s child, my whole family stood guard outside the delivery room—not out of concern for Lina, but fear I’d cause a scene. Mom watched the elevator nervously. "Ethan wouldn’t take the stairs, right?" Dad called security again. "Six-foot-three. Seen him?" Jake paced, fists clenched. "If he shows up, I’ll protect Lina and my son." But I never came. After the birth, Lina handed Mom her phone. "Call Ethan. If he agrees to be godfather, we can still be family." She felt no guilt—just pride in giving our parents a grandchild. What they didn’t know? I wasn’t coming. I was under the scorching sun, training for a peacekeeping mission in Africa. A deployment I might not return from. 1 Lina came home after a week in the hospital. I had just gotten back from the training grounds. I opened the front door to find the whole family gathered around the sofa. “Oh, just look at him! He has Lina’s eyes and nose, but that mouth… that’s all Jake,” my mother cooed. “Mom, he’s so little, you can’t tell yet,” Lina murmured, though she was beaming. “Lina, you’ve been through so much,” Jake said, leaning down to kiss her forehead, his eyes filled with an undisguised love. My father sat to one side, smiling so broadly that new wrinkles creased the corners of his eyes. “Of course you can tell! And I say, thank God the baby looks like you two. If he was Ethan’s kid, he’d probably be a disappointment anyway.” He used to be so proud that I was a soldier. He’d always said that a man’s highest calling was to protect his country, even if it meant long deployments without a return date. But now, coming home, it seemed everything had changed. I watched their perfect little family of five, a bitter, ridiculous taste filling my mouth. Four years ago, I’d left home to join the service for a critical mission. Lina and I were newlyweds. I couldn’t bear the thought of her waiting for me, practically a widow if my mission failed. I’d offered her a divorce, urging her to find a new life. But Lina had only gripped my hand, tears in her eyes, refusing. “Ethan, is that the kind of woman you think I am? One who can’t handle being alone?” she’d said, her voice trembling. “My husband is defending our country. How could I, your wife, leave you at a time like this? I’ll take care of your parents. I’ll be here, waiting for you.” The day I left, my parents and Lina saw me off at the airport. My parents were crying, their hands clutching mine, their clouded eyes tracing the lines of my face. “Ethan, don’t you worry,” my father had choked out. “Your mother and I will be right here, waiting for you to come home safe.” “He’s right,” my mother added. “We’re so proud of you. Just focus on your duty.” I’d walked the line between life and death more times than I could count. The thought of them was what always pulled me back. But when I was discharged and came home two months ago, I walked into a completely different world. My place had been taken, firmly and completely, by another man. “Ethan, you’re back.” Jake’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts. The others looked up. My father’s face immediately soured when he saw me, covered in dirt and grime from training. “Look at the state of you! Are you trying to embarrass us? Did you have to show up looking like a mess on the day Lina comes home?” “Are you doing this on purpose? Trying to bring bad luck into this house?” my mother added, her voice sharp. The same woman who used to fret over every cut and bruise from my training now looked at me with pure disgust. Lina, reclining on the sofa, glowed with the light of new motherhood. “Ethan, I know you’re resentful,” she said softly. “But you were gone for years. Even if I could wait, your parents needed a child. You can’t be so selfish as to deny them a grandchild.” Hearing her words, I couldn’t help it. I laughed. “An adopted son’s child isn’t a real heir.” “Ethan, what did you just say?!” my father roared, slamming his hand on the table and glaring at me. “If it werent for Jake, I would have died of a heart attack on the street! He had no family, and he shares our last name. He was a gift from heaven! I’m telling you, if you watch your mouth, there’s still a place for you in this home. But if you insist on making trouble, I won’t hesitate to throw you out myself!” When my father got angry, his eyebrows shot up and his eyes bulged, a truly terrifying sight. In the past, worried about his heart condition, I would have immediately backed down and apologized. But now, I just stood there, unmoved. Seeing my silence, my father raised a hand to strike me, but Jake stopped him. “Dad, it’s okay. It’s normal for Ethan to need some time to accept this.” Jake stood between us, his expression sincere as he looked at me. “Brother, I hope you can come to the christening. As the baby’s father.” I did a quick calculation. The christening was a month from now. The exact day I was due to return to my unit. In that case, I would give them a christening they would never forget. “Fine,” I said. 2 I went into the bathroom to shower. The sound of their happy chatter wasn’t muffled by the door; it flowed right through, clear as day. “Jake, what should we name the baby?” “Whatever you want, Lina. You’re his mother; you have the final say.” Jake’s voice was gentle, and Lina’s tone was filled with a soft reliance on him. Cold water streamed down my neck, clearing my head. I could still remember the overwhelming joy and excitement I felt two months ago, coming home at last. But when I pushed open the door, the first thing I saw was Lina, her belly swollen and round. There was no surprise or happiness on her face. Only fear. “You! What are you doing back?!” Before I could speak, a strange man walked out of our bedroom. “Who is it, Lina?” he asked. He was wearing my pajamas and my slippers. The moment he saw me, he moved to shield Lina behind him. Our wedding photo, once prominently displayed, was gone. Jake stared at me with wary eyes. “Who are you?” he demanded. “Jake, he… he’s Ethan. My husband.” In that moment, it felt like all the blood in my body rushed to my head. My thoughts shut down, replaced by a dull ringing in my ears. Hearing Lina’s words, Jake’s face broke into a smile, and he walked toward me. “Nice to meet you. I’m Jake, your brother. And the father of your child. I…” My fist was my answer. “You son of a bitch!” I threw him to the ground, punching his face again and again. Lina’s screams filled the air as she tried to stop me, too scared to get close. All I could think was, I’m going to kill this parasite who snuck into my life. It wasn't until my mother’s slap stung my cheek that I stopped. My father pulled me off, and I collapsed onto the floor. My own parents stood over me, their voices a torrent of accusations. The condemnation and disgust in their eyes became a recurring nightmare that would haunt me for a long time. Later, I learned the whole story. In the four years I was gone, Jake had become my parents’ adopted son. He’d taken care of them. And then, he started taking care of my wife. That night, I sat on the sofa and smoked an entire pack of cigarettes. Lina sat beside me, crying through a whole box of tissues. “You’re gone for years at a time,” she sobbed, claiming she did it all for me. “I can handle it, but what about your parents? They’re getting older! They just wanted a grandchild to keep them company. What’s so wrong with that? Jake even said the baby would call you Dad, that he would have nothing to do with him. He’s already given up so much, why can’t you just accept it?” In the dim light of the living room, I looked at her face. It had only been four years, but it felt like a lifetime had passed. As the last cigarette burned down to the filter, I asked in a raw voice, “Do you love him?” Lina didn’t answer, but the way her hand froze told me everything I needed to know. In that instant, all my anger and humiliation felt utterly ridiculous. “Ethan, Jake will be staying in your room for a while.” I had just stepped out of the shower when my father gave the order. “You can pack your things and move into the guest room.” “Why?” My voice was flat. But they reacted as if I’d shouted a challenge, jumping to their feet. My mother pointed a finger at me. “Jake is kind enough to let the child call you Dad! But he is the biological father! What’s wrong with him sleeping in the same room as the mother and child? Ethan, stop being so selfish.” I’d heard that word—selfish—countless times in the past two months. Whenever I showed the slightest hint of disapproval, they’d use it to crush me. But the selfish ones were not me. I wanted to argue, but then I remembered I’d be gone in a month. So I just shut my mouth, gathered my things, and moved into the spare room. That night, exhausted from a full day of training, I should have fallen asleep the moment my head hit the pillow. Instead, strange noises from the room next door kept me tossing and turning. “Wait, I just gave birth, we can’t…” “What do you mean, we can’t? Lina, I’ve missed you like crazy these past few days.” “Ethan’s in the next room!” “So what? He can’t hear. And besides, wouldn’t it be more exciting if he could? Lina, tell me, who’s better? Me, or your husband?” “Mmm… you, of course…” I closed my eyes, my fists clenched so tight my knuckles were white. An image of my first date with Lina flashed in my mind. Back then, she would blush just from holding my hand. Maybe time really does change everything. 3 I didn’t sleep well that night. The next day, I was up before dawn and heading back to the training grounds. This next mission was going to be even more dangerous than the last. I had to be in peak physical condition to avoid being a liability to my team. But as I trained, the ugly memories kept replaying in my head. The loving way Lina looked at Jake. My parents’ fierce protection of him. It all fueled a burning rage inside me. I channeled that rage into my training. I imagined the punching bag was Jake’s face. And I destroyed it. On the way back, I stopped to buy a few buns to fill my stomach. Suddenly, I heard a familiar voice. “Brother?” I turned. The four of them were standing not far from me. Jake was dressed in a sharp suit, his hair slicked back with gel, a pair of gold-rimmed glasses perched on his nose. He looked quite respectable. “Ethan, it really is you! What are you…” He trailed off, looking me up and down. I’d just come from the training grounds, disheveled and sweaty, wearing only a white tank top with my jacket slung over my shoulder. Compared to Jake, I looked like a wreck. Lina stood beside him, frowning, one hand held delicately over her nose. I saw the gesture and my mind flashed back. After every training session in the past, Lina would throw herself into my arms. I’d often push her away, telling her I was covered in sweat. But she never cared. She used to say my sweat was for our country, that she couldn’t be prouder, so how could she ever be disgusted? I guess the difference between love and no love really is that obvious. “Ethan, what have you been doing to look so pathetic?” my mother’s voice cut through my thoughts, dripping with disdain. “If you have no shame, we do!” It was as if all those times she’d tenderly bandaged my wounds and cooked me soup belonged to another lifetime. “Brother, I get it now,” Jake said, his expression one of feigned sympathy. “You were discharged and couldn’t find work, so you started doing construction?” “Ethan, if you need a job, you could have just told me! I can help you find something! There’s no need to degrade yourself like this.” He sounded like he was looking out for me, but without me saying a single word, he’d branded me a manual laborer. I opened my mouth to explain, but when I saw the disgust on Lina’s and my parents’ faces, I closed it again. “Him? Let’s not have him embarrass your company,” my father scoffed, not even bothering to look at me. “He’s got nothing but a pile of muscles.” When I’d first enlisted right out of military school, my father had posted about it on social media for days, bragging about me. Someone had mocked him, saying I was just a dumb jock who was good at fighting but not at thinking. My father had stayed up all night arguing with the man. The next morning, with dark circles under his eyes, he’d clapped me on the shoulder with a proud smile. “Son,” he’d said, “you go protect our country. I’ll protect you.” But now, he was the one calling me a meathead. I looked down, hiding the bitterness in my eyes. “Well… Ethan, we’re heading to dinner. Do you want to join us?” Jake offered. “Let’s not, Jake. That place has a dress code. Ethan, looking like that…” Lina’s voice was soft, but her meaning was crystal clear. “Right,” Jake agreed. “In that case, we’ll see you later, brother.” He gave me a little wave. I watched them walk away, Jake at the center of the group, holding Lina’s hand, looking completely at ease. Fine. This was what they wanted—a son and a husband like Jake. So be it. I’d give them what they wanted. 4 Half a month flew by. It was time for my father’s post-op check-up. I got up early to get ready to take him to the hospital. No matter how he’d treated me, he was still my father. Besides, the surgeon who’d operated on him was a man I’d pulled strings to get, calling in a major favor from a high-ranking officer in the army. The doctor was one of the best in the world and rarely operated on anyone. But when my father saw me ready to go, he just frowned. “What are you doing?” “Taking you for your check-up.” “Save it. Jake is coming to pick me up. If it wasn’t for Jake, I’d be dead from that heart attack! Hmph, raising you has been the same as not having a son at all! Jake met me once and was willing to go beg Dr. Peterson to operate on me!” My father’s words were like a bomb exploding in my head. Dr. Peterson was the surgeon I had arranged! “What are you talking about?! I’m the one who got Dr. Peterson! I…” “You got him?! Ethan, stop lying through your teeth! Do you even know who Dr. Peterson is? Who are you? You think you have that kind of influence? You spent a few years in the army and now you think you’re some big shot.” My father sneered at me, cutting me off. But the moment he saw Jake, his expression changed completely. “Ethan, are you coming to the hospital with us?” Jake asked. “Why would we bring him? He’d just get in the way,” my father said, grabbing Jake’s arm. As they walked out, he glanced back at me. “Ethan, I suggest you learn to be more honest. Don’t disappoint your mother and me again.” In that moment, I finally understood. The truth didn’t matter. What mattered was that in his heart, he had already chosen Jake as his son. As for me, I was just the inconvenient one who came home from service when I wasn't supposed to. I sat on the sofa as my phone buzzed with notifications. Lina was on a shopping spree with my supplementary credit card. During my four years in the service, I’d earned numerous commendations. The severance pay the military gave me upon discharge, I had it all deposited to that card. I had wanted to give Lina a better life. Now, it was clear that was just my own wishful thinking.
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