I started online dating my stepbrother. Online, he calls me "baby," buys me the most expensive gaming gear, and throws money around to win a gemstone cufflink I casually mentioned liking. But offline, because I've always coveted him, my stepbrother hates me. With one hand in his pocket, he warned me with disgust, "If I ever hear those disgusting words from your mouth again, get the hell out of this house. Understand?" 1 Clutching my package, I nodded silently. Arthur Vance was already used to my dull demeanor. He walked past me, taking large strides toward the door. He's been very busy with his company lately, always coming home late, sometimes even pulling all-nighters there. I know he doesn't want to see me. I only came back this weekend to grab some clothes because the housekeeper said he hadn't been home much recently. I didn't expect to run right into him. My fingers tightened around the package, and I forgot how I even walked into my room. It wasn't until the door was shut tight that I leaned against the wall and slid down to sit on the floor. I don't know how much time passed before my phone vibrated a few times. It was the special notification sound I had set for someone. I raised my hand, wiped away the coldness on my face, and opened the chat. My online boyfriend, with his stick-figure avatar, asked: [Baby, did you get the package I sent you?] I drew that stick-figure avatar. It was just a few rough, simple strokes, making it look particularly comical. Staring at the screen, it took me a long while to finally crack a smile. [Got it.] [Good, try it on and see if it fits. I checked the weather forecast for your area, the temperature is dropping soon. Keep warm, don't get sick.] My online boyfriend added: [I've been a bit busy with work lately and haven't had time to play duos with you. I'll definitely make it up to you when this busy period is over. Don't be mad, okay?] Of course I wouldn't be mad. My online boyfriend has already done enough. We met on a gaming forum. He mistook me for a girl and took care of me in every way. Later, when an accidental voice call revealed I was a guy, his attitude didn't change at all. Three months ago, which happened to be the one-year anniversary of us adding each other as friends, my online boyfriend confessed his feelings. He said: [I never thought I could like a guy, but if that person is you, I actually don't mind it at all.] [If you also like guys, would you be with me?] At that time, I had just moved back into the college dorms. The three days before I moved back happened to be my birthday. I was pushed to drink too much by my classmates and lay unconscious on the sofa. I happened to be discovered by Arthur coming home. Drunk out of my mind, I hugged his waist directly and said things I shouldn't have said. That very night, my suitcase was thrown out the front door of the Vance family home. Arthur held an umbrella, watching me coldly as I got drenched in the rain. "Are you sober now?" "Move to the dorms. From now on, I don't want to see you in this house." Because I chose to live on campus mid-semester, I was placed in whatever room had an empty bed. My roommates were from different majors; to me, they were just strangers. I sat on my bed, listening to them laughingly schedule a time to play basketball. When the door closed, I was left alone in the room. It was then that I saw my gaming partner's confession, and I accepted. Perhaps since the day Arthur rejected me and kicked me out, there was a knot of resentment in my heart. I thought, Arthur doesn't like me, but there's bound to be someone in this world who does. 2 My online boyfriend knew nothing about this. I also understood this was unfair to him. When the initial enthusiasm faded after the first few days, all that remained was endless guilt. I admitted my mistake to him, telling him that my agreement that day was an impulsive moment. On the other side of the chat, my gaming partner was quiet for a long time. [It's okay, I'm very glad you could tell me the truth.] [If, if you don't find me repulsive, and maybe have a faint bit of fondness for me, could we try?] That one try has lasted until now. He constantly checks the weather forecast for my area and buys me the most expensive gaming gear. Not long ago, he asked for my address and bought me seasonal fruits. Since then, he frequently sends me things. [So you're in New York. We're not far apart then.] [Once I'm done with this busy period, let's meet up, okay?] I agreed. My online boyfriend was so good, I originally thought I had already forgotten Arthur. I opened my closet and stuffed my heavy clothes into my suitcase one by one. This piece was bought by Arthur, that piece was also bought by Arthur. Even on my nightstand, there was a photo of Arthur and me. If it hadn't been for that loss of control and confession, I could have kept my secret hidden and continued being Arthur's good little brother. Unfortunately, he found out everything. It was my own insatiable greed. As someone with no blood ties to the Vance family, being raised until I was eighteen was already a blessing. Why did I still want more? Closing the door, I left the Vance family villa. Uncle Wang, the driver, said he would give me a ride. Just then, a cool sports car stopped in front of me. The person inside took off his sunglasses. "Leo Hastings! Good on you, coming back without even telling your brothers?" "If Chloe hadn't said she saw someone familiar at the station, I wouldn't have even known you were back. How about it, want to hang out with the guys?" 3 I'm not a member of the Vance family, nor am I Arthur's biological brother. My mom brought me along when she dated Arthur's dad for a while back in the day. Unfortunately, right before their wedding, a car accident took them both. Arthur could barely be considered my stepbrother. But the Vance family refused to acknowledge this. When I was about to be sent to an orphanage, it was a thirteen-year-old Arthur who stopped me. "He is my brother." Arthur stood in front of me. Back then, I only came up to his waist. I had to look up to see his shoulders. From then on, I stayed with the Vance family. After all, my status wasn't official, and few of those heirs from prominent families actually took me seriously. Mark was one of them. I looked at his flashy sports car and smiled: "Mark, how about I treat you to a meal to apologize?" "One meal isn't enough! Come on, get in, I'm calling the shots today!" The private room was full of familiar faces, and everyone started chatting animatedly. I gradually relaxed. Mark opened a bottle of wine and sat next to me. "Hey, what did you say?" "What?" "About you moving to the dorms." Mark curled his lip, "Your brother is such a bro-con. He used to treasure you so much, arranging for a driver to pick you up and drop you off every day, and picking you up himself when he had time." "Did those old farts in the Vance family say something? You just turned eighteen not long ago, and they want to kick you out? Or, did you and Arthur have a falling out?" The fact that I liked my brother was something only I knew. Later, on my eighteenth birthday, my brother found out too. I shook my head and replied to Mark, "Neither." He wanted to ask more, but my phone chimed again. It was a message from my online boyfriend. My online boyfriend asked: [Did the clothes fit? Check the pockets, there's a little surprise inside.] I jerked my head up. Crap, I left the package from my online boyfriend at the house! 4 At the corner of the hallway, I called Auntie Song at the house. I had originally hoped she could bring the package out to me, saving me the trouble of going back and annoying Arthur. But Auntie Song had a family emergency and had just taken a leave of absence. "There's no one at the Vance house right now, and the young master isn't there either. Leo, why don't you go back and get it yourself?" Arthur wasn't there. My eyelashes fluttered, and I replied: "Okay." Mark had been drinking and could only walk me to the door. He leaned his head against another friend, his eyes already a bit glazed, and waved at me. "My birthday is next month, remember to come!" I nodded, agreed, and got into the car heading back to the Vance house. Arthur wasn't there. I couldn't tell if I felt more relieved or more disappointed. Even though he had spoken so harshly, even though I had decided to let him go, I still wanted to see him. The door to the Vance house was slightly ajar. I hesitated at the entrance for a moment, looking up. All the windows were pitch black; no lights were on. It was dead silent all around, only the faint chirping of insects from the bushes nearby could be heard. Perhaps Auntie Song was in a hurry when she left and forgot to close the door tightly. I felt slightly more at ease, pushed the door, and walked in. The package I forgot this afternoon was in the room on the second floor. I walked forward a few steps in the dark, but my foot accidentally kicked something. The object tumbled onto the carpet, making only a faint sound. I turned on my phone's flashlight and looked closely. On the soft wool carpet lay a gemstone cufflink quietly. It sparkled brightly under the flashlight's beam. And the owner of this cufflink was leaning haphazardly on the sofa not far away. His burgundy tie was loose, and a few buttons of his shirt were casually undone. His suit jacket was tossed aside. Seeming to sense the dim light, the man frowned, and his breathing grew slightly heavier. Arthur was home. 5 Still in the posture of bending over to pick up the cufflink, I froze in place for a moment. My gaze swept over Arthur inch by inch. Then I hastily turned off the flashlight. My vision darkened. My other senses became sharper. I smelled the scent of alcohol floating in the air. Arthur had been drinking. Or maybe he was drunk and simply fell asleep on the sofa. I didn't dare turn on the light again. I fumbled my way upstairs and grabbed the package from my online boyfriend. I really should have left right then. Otherwise, I wouldn't make the last bus back tonight. But passing by the living room, I held my breath. In the darkness, the sound of another person's breathing became exceptionally clear. Accompanying it was the sound of my constantly accelerating heartbeat. Arthur liked peace and quiet. After moving out of the Vance family's main estate, he didn't keep many people in the house. Just Uncle Wang, Auntie Song, and me, a brother completely unrelated to him. But today Auntie Song took a leave of absence, so there was no one to take care of him. Leaving him lying on the sofa like this all night, he'd definitely have a headache when he woke up. Two little people were fighting in my heart. One little person said: [Why care about him? When he wakes up, he won't remember your kindness, he'll only find you more disgusting.] The other little person said: [He's asleep anyway, he won't know who did it.] I put down the package and fumbled my way into the small kitchen. The recipe for hangover soup was something I pestered Auntie Song to teach me back then. At that time, I still didn't understand what liking someone meant, but I had an inexplicable possessiveness towards Arthur. Even the hangover soup he drank, I had to make it myself. I served a bowl of hangover soup and placed it on the coffee table. Finally, I found a blanket and lightly draped it over Arthur. Having done all this, I silently said in my heart: [Brother, I'm leaving.] However, the next second, the living room lights flicked on, and a voice bordering on sarcastic came from behind me. Arthur's voice still carried the hoarseness of a hangover. "Don't put on an act in front of me." "Leo, what did you put in the soup?" 6 Screech. The hangover soup was pushed aside, the ceramic bowl making a harsh scraping sound against the coffee table. Arthur raised his hand to press his temples and scoffed: "Having those kinds of feelings for your own brother, do you really think I'd drink something you made?" My restless heart felt as if it were being ruthlessly squeezed, then released, repeatedly, until it grew cold. Ever since I misspoke that day, everything I did was seen by Arthur as having an ulterior motive. So I turned around and drank the bowl of hangover soup in one gulp. Setting the bowl down, I suppressed my voice, "Is that acceptable now?" Without waiting for Arthur to reply, I took large strides towards the door. As my hand gripped the doorknob, I added one more sentence, "I promise, I won't do it again." I promise I won't pester Arthur anymore, won't annoy Arthur anymore, and won't appear in front of Arthur anymore. Blasted by the cold wind outside. I picked up my phone to change my ticket. But my hand was shaking so much I couldn't tap on the page. By the time I managed to click through, my vision had blurred again. The words on the screen blurred into blocks of color, and I couldn't read anything clearly. I forgot how I made it back to school. I only remember that by the time I arrived, I had already missed the first class of the morning. Fortunately, the professor for that class didn't take attendance. I lay in my tiny dorm bed, sleeping soundly. Until my roommates came back with takeout and started talking loudly while gaming with headsets on. I pushed back the bed curtain. "Holy crap, Leo, why didn't you make a sound when you were in the dorm?" A roommate slurped a mouthful of instant noodles. Upon seeing me, his eyes lit up, "Leo, bro, when I was playing basketball yesterday, I heard people saying that the CEO of South Game, Mr. Vance, is your brother?" "One of you is named Vance, the other Hastings. You didn't take your dad's last name and the other took your mom's, did you?" "Leo bro, I have a friend who really wants to get into South Game, but his resume got rejected several times. Young Mr. Hastings, could you maybe help out? Just as a favor to me, open a backdoor for him?" I've always been clumsy with words and don't know how to refuse people. When I was eight, my mom's relatives somehow found out where I was and waited at the gate of the Vance family's main estate. The moment they saw me, they started crying about how hard their lives had been these past years, how they had exhausted their fortunes trying to find my mom and me, and how unexpected it was that fate allowed us to meet again. While clutching my sleeves and wiping their tears, they greedily eyed the massive Vance family estate. I brought them to Arthur. Those relatives bowed and scraped before the young Arthur, exposing their true nature in no time. They said they were willing to stay and take care of me, as long as they were paid a small salary. I hid behind the sofa, quietly watching those people. The uncle with a beer belly, who forcefully seized the house after my grandmother died, kicking my mom and me out onto the streets. The aunt with newly permed hair, who conned my mom out of her last bit of savings, leaving us to hide in a freezing rental without heating, surviving on nearly-expired cookies for two months. It was as if Arthur had eyes in the back of his head. He ignored those relatives' pleas, reached behind him, and pulled me out from behind the sofa. "Leo, do you want them to stay?" Of course I didn't want them to stay, but faced with their crocodile tears, I hesitated. "If you want them to, say yes. If you don't, say no." Arthur ruffled my slightly curly hair, "No matter what you want to do, I've got your back." I didn't dare to look at those relatives' hateful glares and answered honestly, "I don't want them to stay." The next second, those relatives were thrown out by the bodyguards. Once the door closed, all the howling and cursing could no longer be heard. I don't know what else Arthur ordered, but I never saw them again. "Good job." Arthur pressed a cherry into my hand, "A reward for a good kid." At that time, I felt all cartoons paled in comparison; my brother was my superhero. Now, I don't have a superhero anymore. I have to be my own superhero. I climbed down from my dorm bed, grabbed a textbook, getting ready to head to the library, and casually replied, "Can't do it." When the dorm door closed, I could vaguely hear an exasperated voice from inside, "Who is he pretending to be?!" 7 Studying really is something that numbs a person. I went to classes straight for a week. When I opened my game on the weekend, I realized how long it had been since I talked to my online boyfriend. Fortunately, he seemed quite busy lately too and hadn't sent me many messages. [If you're free this weekend, want to play some games together?] [The new item is pretty good. I bought one for you, it's in your mailbox, remember to check it.] [By the way, did you see the gift I sent you?] Mentioning the gift reminded me that I had left in a hurry last time and ended up leaving the package behind. Auntie Song was still on vacation and probably wouldn't be back for another three days to help me mail it. So I told the truth, [Sorry, I left the package at home. I won't be able to get it for a few days.] My online boyfriend seemed to be waiting in front of his screen; his reply was almost instantaneous. [Okay, no rush.] [I bought you that gemstone cufflink you said looked nice last time. I hope you like it.] Even though I knew my online boyfriend had money, I never imagined he was this rich. If I remembered correctly, that gemstone cufflink sold for over ten million at auction. When my online boyfriend asked me about it back then, I just casually said it looked nice. And he actually gave it to an online friend he'd never even met without batting an eye? I took a sharp breath, deleting and rewriting my message in the chat box, [That's too expensive. Please give me your address, and I'll send it back to you once I get it.] [As long as you like it. Don't worry about anything else. I also don't want the gift I gave you to become a burden.] My online boyfriend, sporting his stick-figure avatar. [If it really feels like a heavy burden, then why don't you log on more often and meet up with me more? Just consider it a return gift.] I checked my bank account balance. Needless to say, Arthur had provided for me all these years. The long string of numbers in my account was enough for me to squander for a lifetime. When the time comes, if I have the chance, I'll give a gift of similar value back to my online boyfriend. Thinking of this, I stopped refusing and accepted it. However, during our matches tonight, my online boyfriend made frequent mistakes. He seemed to be in a bad state, stepping into small traps multiple times. The randomly matched teammates were talking trash, so I just kicked them out and played duos with him. Another match ended. I looked at our disastrous record, feeling a bit of heartache for the rank I had achieved after staying up several nights. [Are you doing okay lately?] [Sorry, my bad.] My online boyfriend and I sent messages at almost the exact same time. He was silent for a moment, [I'm okay, just a little problem at home.] Having known him for over a year, my online boyfriend was exceptionally calm in every situation. It was hard for me to imagine what kind of issue could make him so troubled. Seeing me ask, my online boyfriend didn't hide it. [It's nothing, I just realized I have some misunderstandings with the kid at home. It's my fault for neglecting his feelings usually, and I might have also given him some wrong guidance.] This was the first time I heard him mention it. It seemed this was a family member he cared about very much. [When things calm down, you can find a chance to communicate with him properly.] My last family member didn't want me anymore. I didn't have family anymore. So, I hoped my online boyfriend wouldn't end up like this. 8 We played games until dawn. After exchanging goodnights with my online boyfriend, I put down my phone. At the Vance house. Arthur propped his hand against his brow, pausing for a moment. He picked up the water glass beside him and went downstairs to pour some water. The villa was exceptionally quiet. When he looked up, Arthur subconsciously glanced toward the room on the second floor. It was empty inside, most of the things had been packed away. And the original owner of that room was the one he had driven out himself. An unprovoked sense of irritability welled up. Arthur put down the glass. As he was leaving, he accidentally caught a glimpse of a cardboard box sitting in the corner. Auntie Song wasn't there, and Arthur didn't come home often either. He had no idea how long that box had been sitting in the corner. Perhaps it was trash that had been forgotten to be thrown out, or maybe it was a package bought who knows when and forgotten. Arthur didn't pay it any mind. He had just taken a few steps towards the stairs when he returned as if possessed. The package was opened; inside was a familiar-looking jacket. If he remembered correctly, he had bought two similar matching jackets not long ago. One for himself, and the other for his online boyfriend. So it was a jacket. Arthur casually tossed the jacket onto the sofa. Clack. Arthur looked down. A small burgundy square box fell out of the jacket pocket.
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