Fifteen days after we broke up, my ex texted me, inviting me to his wedding. My vision went dark, and I replied: "My sister passed away in a car accident three days ago." "Her last words were that her biggest regret was breaking up with you and not marrying you." "On her behalf, I wish you a happy marriage." That ought to make him feel guilty enough to die. Heh. The very next day, my ex showed up at my hometown, looking travel-worn and exhausted. And there I was, in the middle of a blind date, saying: "I'm three months pregnant, you don't mind, right?" 1 My boyfriend, Arthur Vance, treated me incredibly well. He gave me an allowance of $15,000 a month, bought me a house and a car, and planned out my career path. He helped me take my boss out to dinner, which got me a promotion and a raise. He was practically the ideal boyfriend. Until I bumped into him on a blind date. Only then did I realize he wasn't just dating me. He was keeping me as his little canary. Son of a bitch. I begged him on the spot to delay his marriage. I could still be his little bird for a while longer. 2 Looking back, I should have been calm and restrained. Regardless of whether he went on blind dates or got married, I just needed to keep reaping the benefits. He really didn't have any flaws. But the better he was, the gentler and more considerate he was to me, the more I imagined him being just as good to other women. Jealousy twisted my face into something hideous. I became paranoid and suspicious. We fought every single day. A perfect person like me, reduced to arguing like a shrew. Men really are no good; they always ruin perfect women. 3 After agonizing over it, I decided to break up with him. He couldn't understand it at all. He said, "Just pretend I opened another company. Would you mind if I had to work overtime two days a week?" "You'll never even meet. I'm here with you five days a week, and home for two. What more could you want?" "Chloe, be mature. If you leave me, where are you going to find a man as outstanding as I am?" "Doesn't your future child need a capable father to support them?" I still insisted on breaking up. Because I had become someone I didn't recognize, and it caused me immense pain. But Arthur, that bastard, was determined to make me realize how miserable my life would be without him. My boss, finding out I no longer had the powerful Arthur backing me, started ordering me around constantly and even made me accompany clients while they drank. Accompany his ass. I smashed a wine bottle over someone's head and earned myself five days in the local jail. After getting out, the company fired me, and the boss went around calling me a crazy bitch... Me: ... 4 I still couldn't find a job. I had a house, a car, and used to have an allowance. But my expenses were high. To match a rich guy like Arthur, I only bought luxury brands... Even though he gifted me things, I still spent a lot... Plus, I had to maintain the villa. The maintenance fees alone were several thousand a month... I really wanted to sell it. But the housing market had crashed recently. If I sold now, I'd take a massive loss. The car was a sports car, a total gas guzzler. I wanted to sell that too, but it wasn't worth it. And I actually really liked it. When we broke up, he didn't give me any severance pay. I only had a few tens of thousands left in my account. I suspected this was his way of controlling me. Even though he fed me every day, he never gave me the keys to the granary. What a scheming man. 5 After watching me make a fool of myself for a while. Arthur showed up again. He reasoned with me earnestly. "See? Without me, you're just like all those other dusty, ordinary women in society." "You're the one I love in my heart, isn't that enough? Marriage is just a formality, why are you so obsessed with it?" He promised again: "Chloe, let's get back together. I won't get married. I'll just be with you, okay?" I was having such a hard time back then, I really didn't want to leave him, so I believed his lies. But subconsciously, I was just deceiving myself. We went back to dating normally. But I started selling my old luxury goods. I really lost a lot of money on them. I asked him to increase my allowance. He refused. He just wanted to keep me hooked with money. He nourished my ambition with luxury goods, making it impossible for me to return to my old life. I truly couldn't go back to my previously simple life. Having experienced glitz and glamour, I felt using affordable things was a waste of a beautiful life. But I didn't have the money to support it. I could only rely on Arthur. 6 He was still going on blind dates. He just hid it better. I didn't catch him. But I knew he was going on them. I secretly checked his phone. There were women sharing photos of their daily lives with him. He would reply. Occasionally, he would send them a photo of his own life. I screen-recorded his phone. Then I sat alone in the library, thinking for an entire afternoon. What kind of life did I really want to live? 7 I met Arthur when I was an undergraduate. He came to our university for some business, couldn't find his way, and asked me for directions. I showed him the way. That's how we met. Later, he pursued me. He was several years older than me; pursuing me was really easy. Sigh, back then I idolized him so much. I thought he was successful, an elite. He fit the exact image of a successful person that our teachers had instilled in us. He really treated me well. When I applied for grad school, he helped me contact a mentor. I didn't suffer much during my master's. When I graduated, he arranged a job for me. I never experienced the pain and anxiety of job hunting. We were together for almost four years. I was still waiting for him to propose. I had hinted many times that we should settle down. He always said: "You're still young. I want you to see the world before deciding to marry me. Otherwise, I'm afraid you'll regret it later." Before I knew he was going on blind dates, hearing those words moved me to death. I thought his love for me was true love. That he was genuinely trying to elevate me. Sigh, men are really good at lying. I wanted to hate him. But he treated me so well. He was more attentive and thoughtful than my parents. The money and energy he spent on me was more than my parents ever did. I couldn't even imagine if anyone else in this world would ever love me more than he did. But I also couldn't love him completely, turning a blind eye and deaf ear. The thought of him being intimate, sleeping with, or even having children with another woman made me want to die. 8 I lived in this state of agonizing conflict. I still couldn't make a firm decision. In the end, what made me decide to say goodbye was his blind date coming to find me. She wasn't arrogant or overbearing. Her last name was Chen. She looked like a girl next door. Her whole demeanor was very gentle, and she spoke softly. It wasn't fake gentleness, but a true, deeply ingrained politeness. She apologized to me: "I'm sorry, Miss Smith, for taking up your time." "I sought you out not to provoke you, but to tell you that Arthur truly loves you. Don't give up on him just because we are getting married." "I know what it feels like to truly love someone. My marriage to him is purely a business alliance. I have someone I love too, it's just... he passed away." "I want lovers to be together. I don't want you to have the same regrets I do, which is why I came to tell you this. Arthur is a very good man. Once we marry, we will respect each other, and I won't interfere with your relationship." 9 When she said the person she loved passed away, tears welled up in her eyes. But I didn't want to continue like this. If Arthur's fiancée was a domineering, arrogant woman, maybe I would have rebelled and insisted on staying with him. But Miss Chen wasn't. She had already lost the love of her life and was pitiful enough. She was the treasure in her late lover's heart. If in her marriage, her husband kept a mistress, how lonely and bitter would her life be? How heartbroken would her lover be? Moreover... a woman as serene and unambitious as her, would Arthur truly not be moved? Even I was captivated by her aura. And Arthur had already decided to marry her. Out of all the women he had met, he chose her. Who's to say this isn't another form of being moved? They wouldn't just get married directly. They would go through many dates, deep conversations, countless family gatherings, and a grand ceremony. They would hold hands, kiss, and sleep together. Arthur was inherently a gentle person. If he heard Miss Chen's story, he would definitely feel pity for her. I hated this endless cycle of imagination. 10 I found Miss Chen. I embarrassedly asked her if she could buy the house and car Arthur had given me. Because I wanted to leave this place completely. I wanted to go back to my hometown and start a new life. Of course, bringing a large sum of money back would make the drop in living standards less drastic, allowing me to adapt faster. Miss Chen reluctantly refused me. Because she was afraid Arthur would misunderstand her. Naturally, Arthur quickly found out about this. He was furious: "Haven't you made enough of a scene?" "She doesn't even mind, what do you mind?" "Is your love for me really that fragile?" "Just because I'm getting married, you want to break up? Are worldly values more important, or is how well I treat you and our love more important?" He seriously told me again: "We'll live just like before, okay? Chloe, I truly love you." "I have to enter this alliance, or the family's resources won't lean towards me. I'm not the only heir; I have to fight for it. I don't want to be a nobody, and you wouldn't love a mediocre me either. Right?" When he said those words, I felt incredibly sad. But I didn't even know what I was sad about. 11 I understood his ambition and aspirations. But I couldn't be his secret mistress. So I said: "Let's break up, I'm serious. It's precisely because I love you that I can't bear it. I'll go crazy." "I understand you, and I don't hate you. In fact, I'm very grateful for your care." He looked at me in disbelief. For the first time, I saw that look in his eyes. The look of looking at an idiot. Before, no matter what I did, he was always full of encouragement and love. I didn't expect that upon breaking up, he would look at me with such eyes. He said: "Without me, how will you live? Can you guarantee the men you meet in the future will treat you better than I did?" "You don't need to say all that to brainwash me. I can't accept you marrying someone else." I insisted on leaving. He said: "Since you have so much pride, don't rely on the house and car I bought you." I felt like a beggar whose hand was caught in the till. I couldn't even confidently snap back at him. I had to give up the idea of selling the house and car and slinked back to my hometown in disgrace. In short, the parting was very unpleasant. 12 I felt we didn't break up cleanly enough. Because the house and car hadn't been dealt with properly. I should have sold them all. After all, to start a new life, I needed money too. After returning to my hometown, my mom started pushing me to go on blind dates. My family lives in a rural village. I lived in a daze all day long. Aside from washing up and eating, I just slept. Having suffered heartbreak, I needed to sleep constantly to heal my wounds. Only by remaining in a stupor could I forget the pain. But the Lunar New Year was approaching, and many migrant workers had returned to the village. My mom set me up with a guy. His first words were: "That outfit you're wearing wasn't cheap, right? I don't like materialistic women." "But I believe I can transform you into a non-materialistic woman." He started boasting endlessly about how awesome he was, how great he was at business, which government officials were his friends, which CEOs were his bros... Spit flew everywhere. 13 Looking at this blind date, I truly felt a wave of sadness. I probably really couldn't find a high-quality man like Arthur again. Although he was very calculating. But he was already the cream of the crop. And he was so generous. Just as I was reminiscing about Arthur. He sent me a message. He said: "I'm getting married on the tenth day of the first lunar month. Are you coming?" I was furious reading it. What did he mean? Was he coming to provoke me? I had to make him pay. So I thought about it and replied: "My sister passed away in a car accident three days ago." "Her last words were that her biggest regret was breaking up with you and not marrying you." "On her behalf, I wish you a happy marriage." "I hope you don't send any more messages to this number. It's my only way of remembering her." Heh, let's see if that doesn't guilt-trip him to death. 14 The next day, that blind date guy came over again. I had already told my mom I didn't like him. I really didn't know what he was doing here. The blind date guy said: "I don't think you need to feel insecure. Even though you're not good enough for me, I'm willing to accommodate you, so you don't have to reject me." Me: ... I really envy him, being so confident. So I continued chatting with him. I said: "I'm three months pregnant. Since you're so broad-minded, you probably don't mind, right?" The blind date guy's face changed. A ghostly voice came from behind me: "Chloe, didn't you die in a car accident?" I turned around and saw Arthur staring at me with bloodshot eyes... 15 In just a few days of not seeing him, Arthur had completely changed. His hair was even half-white. His eyes looked like he had pulled all-nighters for several days straight. He looked haggard. I looked at him, utterly confused, and blurted out: "Holy shit, did you go bankrupt? Why do you look so miserable?" After asking that, I thought to myself, maybe I was his lucky charm, and after I left him, he lost his touch. He didn't answer me. He just suddenly rushed towards me. I was startled. Did he want to kill me after we broke up? Before I could figure out why, he had already hugged me tightly. This man was too devious and ruthless. We already broke up, and he still wanted to strangle me? At the very last second when I was about to die, he finally let me go. Then I saw tears shimmering in his eyes. I suddenly felt he was quite pitiful. I comforted him, saying: "It's okay even if you went bankrupt. You can still go begging. I heard beggars make pretty good money." Arthur ignored me. He just glared at me fiercely and said: "Aren't you already dead?" I rolled my eyes dramatically: "If you curse me during the New Year again, watch out or I'll beat you up." 16 The blind date guy pointed at the two of us with a trembling finger and asked: "Who is he? How can you be so lacking in female virtue? You're not a virgin anymore, are you? If you're not a virgin, I'm not paying a bride price." I quickly explained to the blind date guy: "No, no, he's not my Arthur. You can't misunderstand. He's a gigolo I keep. I even pay him $5,000 a month. You don't mind, do you?" The blind date guy screamed a few times and then ran away. Before running off, he added: "I've never seen a woman as materialistic as you, opening your mouth and asking for $5,000. My mom raised me, it wasn't easy, and I haven't even given her $5,000! You'll never get married in your life!" I was really going to die of anger. After the blind date guy ran away, Arthur was still holding my hand tightly. "Chloe, I didn't agree to break up with you." I found it even more unbelievable than he did: "You're getting married, and you still haven't broken up with me? Are you an octopus, bro?" Arthur said: "I'm not getting married." Only a ghost would believe that. My mom was very happy to see Arthur. She asked what our relationship was. Arthur said he was my Arthur. My mom looked at his empty hands and was very dissatisfied, feeling he was impolite. Because he came to our house empty-handed. Arthur also realized this problem. He asked me to take him to town. 17 We walked towards town together. I told him: "I will not be your mistress. Give up on that idea." He remained silent, not saying a word, just holding my hand tightly. After a long while, he asked with difficulty: "Do you really care that much about those empty titles?" I said: "If I married someone else but still continued to be with you, could you accept that?" He fell silent. I truly felt his moral compass was messed up. He actually thought that if he got married, I could continue to be with him, and he considered this completely normal. He was still trying to persuade me: "People in our circle never marry the ones they truly love, but they still stay together. It's no different." I looked at him seriously: "So next time you date someone, make sure you keep your eyes peeled. Check if the woman is from your circle. It's very clear I am not from your circle." We had reached a large bridge. Below the bridge, the river waters rolled and surged. Mist rose from the bridge surface. It gave a feeling of vastness between heaven and earth. I was actually quite happy that he came to find me. It was just that we were destined not to be on the same path, and I couldn't help but feel a sense of sorrow. But wallowing in sadness wasn't my style. So, I still had to say goodbye to this ill-fated relationship. 18 He asked me to take him to the supermarket. I took him directly to the bus station. I said: "If you're taking a plane, take a bus to the city first, then grab a cab to the airport. You should go." "I'm very grateful for the years I spent with you, and I will miss them. But I really won't be anyone's mistress." He said: "When I received your message yesterday, I really thought you were dead. I rushed back from abroad. I'm not bankrupt. I thought you were dead, and when I looked in the mirror this morning, I realized my hair had turned half white. I truly love you. Over these years, you must have felt it too." I looked at his hair. Tears welled up in my eyes. He treated me well, he loved me very much. But so what? He loved his career more. He loved his power. He asked finally: "Even if I love you this much, aren't you willing to sacrifice a little for me?" I firmly shook my head. 19 He smiled faintly at me. He looked as if he was relieved. I was a bit confused. He said: "You've really made up your mind to break up with me, haven't you?" I nodded. He smiled bitterly: "Actually, it's still because you don't love me enough. If you truly loved me, you would be willing to do anything for me." I said: "You're getting married, and that's also because you don't love me enough. If you loved me enough, you wouldn't go and marry someone else." He raised his hands in a gesture of surrender: "What a sharp-tongued little girl. Truly worthy of the little girl I've liked for so many years and carefully nurtured for so many years." "Can you let me treat you to one last meal?" I didn't seem to have a reason to refuse. We went to the most luxurious hotel in the county to eat. In the private room, I ate in silence, and he drank in silence. This was probably the most oppressive, final meal we had ever shared. But I started feeling more and more off. My vision grew increasingly blurry. I even felt drowsy. In my last moment of consciousness, I saw a bizarre smile on Arthur's lips. He had turned to the dark side. 20 When I woke up again, I was back at the place I used to live with Arthur. I looked at the iron chain on my ankle and fell deep into thought. Arthur, he was seriously ill. He must have a screw loose, right? He actually locked me up. I looked at Arthur in disbelief. He looked back at me with cold eyes, as if I had betrayed him. I asked him: "What are you trying to do?" "I just don't want to lose you. Having you under my nose makes me feel more at ease. You really scared me this time. Look at my hair, scared white by you." I really thought he was laughable. I was actually quite touched originally. I never expected him to imprison me. Arthur's reasoning was extremely simple. He just wanted to lock me up. He believed that only by locking me up would I be obedient. And he also wanted me to have his child. He thought that after having a child, I would compromise because of the child and stay. And he would continue to go ahead with his marriage alliance.
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