So, when he turned 28, I was already 33. He used to tell me that age would never be an issue between us. But later, he told his childhood best friend: "I don't know what it is, man. But once Sarah crossed 30, I just felt she was... kind of dirty." Then, he found a mistress. She looked a bit like me. He gave me his love, and gave her his sex. He thought he had the perfect, flawless setup. Until I handed him the divorce papers. I smiled and told him, "Actually, there's one huge perk to dating and marrying an older woman. And that is, an older woman knows how to play the game—and she knows how to take a loss!" 01 A woman's sixth sense is terrifyingly sharp when it needs to be. While Caleb Wright was taking a shower, a call came through on his phone. It was a local number, no caller ID. I answered it. I said "Hello" twice, and asked "Who is this?" The person on the other end didn't make a sound and hung up immediately. Those few seconds of silence felt like a mutual understanding. The other person knew who I was. And I realized that something was very wrong. So, I unlocked Caleb's phone. Using that phone number, I tracked down her profile on his social media apps. It was a young girl with a soft, cute anime profile picture. Her nickname was "Sweetheart," there was no saved contact name, and her notifications were set to mute. Their chat history was completely clean. Except for one unread message: [I miss you.] Just those three words made my heart violently clench. I figured, there was a massive chance Caleb was cheating on me. My hand holding the phone suddenly felt weak and shaky. I clicked into the girl's feed. Her cover photo was a selfie—messy bun, duck lips, radiating youthful energy. She was undeniably pretty. I didn't look too closely. I just pulled out my own phone and took a picture of the screen. She didn't have many posts. I scrolled through quickly and froze on one of them. She wrote: [I told you I only wanted $143! Not a penny more!] Below it was a screenshot. A screenshot of her Venmo history with Caleb. Her note for him: Princess Feeder. She asked Caleb: [Where's my $143?] Caleb transferred her $2,000. She didn't accept it. She sent it right back. [I only want $143!] Caleb replied with a string of ellipses, but eventually sent her the exact amount she asked for. She replied: [Do you know what 143 means? It means 'I love you'—I want to be with you forever!] My face was totally blank. I took a picture of it all for my records. After exiting the girl's feed, I opened Caleb's bank and Venmo apps. I checked every single transaction between them. One after another, scrolling down, there was seemingly no end to it. The most consistent ones were the massive $5,000 transfers at the beginning of every month. That had been going on for three months. Besides that, there were hundreds of random transfers. A thousand here, two thousand there, a hundred, two hundred. Countless. Including the special numbers: $143, $520, $1314. I photographed every single transaction. Throughout the entire process, I was dead calm. I was even calm enough to mark their chat as "unread" before I put the phone down. 02 "What's wrong? Why are you zoning out?" Caleb walked out of the bathroom, drying his hair with a towel, looking at me with confusion. I snapped back to reality. I looked up at him. He was only wearing a towel. Broad shoulders, narrow waist, eight-pack abs. Caleb had always kept himself in incredible shape. People used to envy me: "With a guy who looks like that, as long as he isn't out committing murder or arson, what can't you forgive? Plus, he's so devoted to you!" I used to think Caleb was devoted to me, too. But looking at it now, that was just my own delusion. "Nothing. Someone just called your phone, didn't say a word, and hung up. Do you want to check it?" "Probably just a spam call. Ignore it." Caleb's expression was completely natural as he took the phone. He threw his damp towel into the hamper and grabbed his pack of cigarettes from the nightstand. "I'm gonna go smoke on the balcony." Because I hated the smell of smoke, Caleb always went out to the balcony. Turns out, he wasn't really going out there to smoke. A moment later, he walked back in. He started changing his clothes while talking to me. "Babe, I gotta head out for a bit. It's an emergency, don't wait up for me." "What happened?" "The machines over at Greg's shop are acting up. I don't know if the guy's just cursed or what. They were totally fine during calibration, but the screens keep glitching out on him. I need to go take a look. If it gets too late, I'll just crash there." "Is Liam going with you?" "Yeah!" It sounded so real. He had facts, he had a timeline, he even had a witness. I nodded. "Drive safe." 03 Caleb left in a hurry. I stared at our framed wedding photo on the wall for a long time. I just couldn't understand. Why? Why would Caleb cheat? And that girl. Who was she? Her face, her financial dynamic with Caleb, her social media posts... Everything flashed through my mind, piece by piece. Suddenly, I caught something. I scrambled for my phone. That girl. I had seen her before. 04 It was about six months ago. Caleb had been taken to the police precinct for getting into a bar brawl. I went to bail him out. He was mostly fine, just a scrape on his cheekbone. But his mood was awful. His eyes were vicious, his whole body radiating hostility. Aside from his teenage years, I hadn't seen Caleb like that in a very long time. He had beaten the other guy to a bloody pulp. He clearly hadn't held back. The other guy was screaming for an apology and compensation. Caleb just sneered. If I hadn't been holding him back, he would have lunged at the guy again. After the paperwork was finally sorted, I led him out. A girl wearing an apron from a local diner rushed up to us. She thanked Caleb profusely: "Sir, if I hadn't run into you today, I really don't know what would have happened. Seriously, thank you so much!" I paused and looked at Caleb. He looked completely impatient. "I suggest you get a new job." The girl looked distressed. "If I had any other choice, I wouldn't be..." Caleb's expression grew even more irritated. He cut her off roughly. "Not my problem. Do whatever you want!" Maya Davis had come with me that day. As Caleb shook the girl off and stormed ahead, Maya pulled my arm: "Don't you think that girl looks a little bit like you?" I laughed it off, thinking she was overthinking it. But I couldn't help glancing back at the girl one more time. The image in my memory merged perfectly with the photo on the phone. It was her. 05 Caleb didn't come home that night. He finally walked in the following evening. He brought me takeout from my favorite Mexican spot. "It's from that place you love. I waited in line forever. You eat first, I'm gonna hit the shower!" "Okay!" Caleb went into the bathroom. I grabbed my spare keys, carried the takeout bag, and headed straight to the underground garage. His car had been washed. It was spotless. The passenger seat was adjusted to the position I usually kept it in. There seemed to be absolutely nothing out of the ordinary. But none of that was what I was there for. I wanted the dashcam footage. I pulled the memory card and reviewed all the footage from yesterday to today. Caleb drove to the south side of the city. He called the girl and said two words: "Come down!" The girl practically skipped as she hopped into the passenger seat. The sound of kissing. Heavy breathing. "Did you touch that old woman?" "Shut up!" "Did you or not?" Caleb's voice was hoarse, thick with lust. "What do you think?" The girl sounded smug: "You're all mine!" "Don't go begging for mercy later!" The speed of the car perfectly illustrated the driver's urgency. The car finally parked at an apartment complex near the local college. The next time the camera recorded video, it was 10:00 AM the following day. Only Caleb was in the car. The video played quietly. I sat in the car, my entire body stiff. My muscles were so tense they ached. I reached out to turn off the screen, but a phone rang through the audio. It was Liam Carter, Caleb's best friend. "Where are you man? Why aren't you here yet?" "On my way!" "Tsk. Being this late isn't your style. Don't tell me you were with your little Sweetheart again." Caleb just hummed in agreement. Liam sounded somewhat speechless: "No way, man. The frequency of this is way too high. Are you falling for her?" Caleb chuckled lightly. "What's real? What's fake?" "Cut the crap! I thought you were just playing around. How did this turn into a long-term thing? Weren't you so madly in love with Sarah you'd die for her? Why the sudden cheating?" That question seemed to stump Caleb. After a long pause, he finally spoke: "Sarah is 33." "And?" "I don't know why, man. But once she crossed thirty, I just felt she was... kind of dirty." 06 How long had it been since Caleb touched me? I smoked a cigarette while thinking about it. It felt like it started right around six months ago. During that time, work had gotten crazy. I was pushing for a promotion, pulling all-nighters, working back-to-back shifts. Every day I came home, all I wanted to do was sleep. Caleb would wrap his arms around me, trying to kiss me. I pushed him away. "Stop, I'm too exhausted. Next time!" The first time, Caleb didn't mind. He even felt bad for me. The second time, he wasn't happy, but he kept his temper in check. The third time, he got mad and slammed the door as he left. I had to track him down at a bar later that night. I realized I was handling things poorly. So I wrapped my arms around his neck and accepted his aggressive kisses. That time wasn't beautiful. It actually hurt. Caleb noticed, and finished quickly. That night, he turned his back to me. It was the first time he hadn't rolled over to hold me. I felt helpless. I didn't know how to fix it, and I didn't know how to coax him back into a good mood. But he managed to fix his own mood before I could. He said it was his fault. He said he was being too impatient. "Don't overthink it, and don't take it to heart. Once you're done with this busy period, let's take a vacation!" I thought the issue was resolved. He was still good to me. Even though he no longer held me when we slept, even though we hadn't been intimate in six months. He was still good to me. But now he was saying that he thought I was dirty. That word. From the moment I heard it until now, just thinking about it sent chills deep into my bones. My hand holding the cigarette hadn't stopped shaking. The ash fell onto my hand, burning my skin. But it was nothing compared to the damage that one word had done to me. 07 Caleb called me, asking where I was and why I wasn't back yet. I told him I went downstairs to throw out the trash and would be right up. He just said, "Okay." "I'm gonna go to sleep then!" By the time I got upstairs, Caleb was already fast asleep. He was facing the left, clinging to the edge of the bed, leaving more than half the mattress empty for me. I didn't get under the covers. I just sat on the edge of the bed. I stared at his back all night. The year I met him, he was eighteen. He had just been accepted to a college in this city. The rebellious teenager had applied to a school behind his parents' backs, grabbed his acceptance letter, and ran. He didn't even pack luggage, just a backpack. His older brother, Ethan Wright, was worried about him. Ethan asked for a favor and had me pick him up at the bus station. "He has no money on him, and the dorms aren't open yet. Let him crash at your place for a bit. The kid is stubborn as hell. If he says or does anything to piss you off, just smack him!" I thought Ethan was insane. Even if he was just a kid, there was no way I was letting him live with me. I was fully prepared to just rent him a hotel room. But he looked so pathetic. And so obedient. When I got to the station, he was squatting under a big tree, hugging his backpack like an abandoned puppy. He quietly followed me back to my apartment. Before I could even tell him he needed to stay somewhere else, he grabbed my sleeve and started playing the pity card. "Sarah, I'll be so good. I'll cook for you, I'll clean the apartment. Please don't kick me out!" I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I thought he was just sweet-talking me. But he actually cooked for me every single day. He even rode his little electric scooter to pick me up from work. Because of him, my lonely, quiet apartment finally felt alive. The daily grind suddenly didn't feel so exhausting anymore. We lived under the same roof for a month. Eventually, I helped him buy his dorm supplies and moved him onto campus. At first, I thought it was just a fleeting moment in time. But later he told me, he only applied to that university because of me. He said he saw me once when he was sixteen. And from then on, I was the only thing he looked forward to. This man—back when he was still just a boy—offered me his entire, unblemished heart. I fell for it. But now, he wanted it back. So I had to pull myself out of the mud, as fast as I could.
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