The girl my family’s scholarship supported was a master of weaponized incompetence. Before the conference championships, I told her explicitly not to touch my things. So, naturally, she slipped a banned stimulant into my water bottle. I was reported for cheating. My results were nullified, I was banned from the sport for life, and the university expelled me. When I confronted her, she collapsed into a puddle of perfectly formed tears. “Chloe, I swear, I just wanted you to win… I never thought this would happen.” My boyfriend, Liam, wrapped his arms around her, glaring at me. “She was trying to help. Why do you have to be so cruel to her?” I spiraled. I locked myself away at home. Then she showed up, claiming she felt guilty, with Liam in tow and a bottle of expensive tequila. A peace offering, they said. A way to drown my sorrows. After they forced ten shots down my throat, my head was splitting open. I begged her to go buy me something for the pain. She came back with ibuprofen, told me they were hangover pills, and watched as I took them. I died from acute gastrointestinal bleeding. At the hospital, she put on a heart-wrenching performance. “I’m so sorry, it’s all my fault! I’m just so dumb, I can’t even tell the difference between painkillers and hangover cures…” When the police questioned her, Liam provided her alibi. He told them I’d been unable to handle the pressure after the cheating scandal and had intentionally overdosed. A suicide. The next time I open my eyes, I’m back. The day before the championships. 1 “Chloe, I got you a Red Bull! For energy before your race tomorrow.” The familiar words send a tremor through my body. I look around—the scent of chlorine, the echoing shouts in the natatorium, the exact shade of blue on the Northwood University banners. I realize it instantly. I’m back. Before I can process it, Mia shoves the cold can into my hand. My boyfriend, Liam, is watching her with that stupid, adoring look on his face. “You’re so thoughtful, Mia. Chloe’s lucky to have a friend like you.” A bitter laugh escapes my lips. Anyone with half a brain knows that competitive swimming has a zero-tolerance policy for caffeine-loaded energy drinks like Red Bull. It’s practically regulation 101. In my last life, I’d turned her down politely. But just to be safe, I’d specifically warned her not to touch any of my gear. The next day, I was flagged for a random drug test. They found amphetamines in my system and in my water bottle. My entire team’s results were voided. I was banned for life. The university expelled me. It was only later that I learned Mia was the one who had spiked my water. When I went to her for answers, she’d simply dissolved into tears and fallen into Liam’s arms. “Chloe, I swear, I just wanted you to win… I never thought this would happen.” And Liam, my Liam, held her and yelled at me. “She meant well, for God’s sake! Why do you have to bully a girl like her?” That was the beginning of the end. The depression swallowed me whole. Then Mia and Liam showed up with that bottle of tequila to "apologize." Ten shots later, the world was spinning. I begged her to get me something for the crushing headache. She came back with ibuprofen, calling it a hangover cure, and I swallowed it down. At the hospital, her voice was a fragile, breaking thing. “I’m so sorry… I’m just so stupid, I can’t even tell painkillers and hangover pills apart…” And Liam backed her up, telling the police I couldn’t live with the shame. That I’d killed myself. Thinking of that agony, that betrayal, my hand clenches into a fist. Then, in one fluid motion, I toss the Red Bull into the nearest trash can. Mia freezes, her eyes instantly welling up. “Chloe… you don’t like it? I’m sorry, my family… we don’t have much money. This was all I could afford. I saved up for two weeks to buy it for you. It was the best I could do.” The sight of her shimmering tears sends Liam into protective overdrive. He turns on me, his voice sharp. “What the hell, Chloe? We get it, you grew up with money and you look down on the rest of us, but that was a gift. That was her showing she cares. How could you just throw it away?” The rest of the team starts to murmur, their eyes on me. “That was harsh, Chloe. Even if you didn’t want it, you didn’t have to humiliate her like that.” “This is a team, not your personal kingdom. Mia isn’t your servant.” Mia looks at me, tears streaming down her face. “It’s my fault. Everyone, please don’t be mad at Chloe.” I stare down the ring of her defenders, my voice ice. “Anyone who’s been in this sport for more than five minutes knows energy drinks are banned during competition. So, Mia, are you really that clueless, or did you do it on purpose?” Mia’s face crumples in on itself, a mask of pure, wounded innocence. “I’m so sorry, Chloe. I’m so stupid, I can’t do anything right. I even mess up trying to buy you a drink.” Liam wraps an arm around her shoulder. “Hey, stop that. You’re not stupid.” He pulls her into a hug, then glares at me. “Do you really need to make a big deal out of everything? She was trying to be nice. It was an honest mistake. She’s a little naive, you don’t have to attack her for it.” I’m so full of rage I can barely see straight. I step forward and slap him. Hard. “To hell with her ‘honest mistake.’ Her good intentions were meant to destroy my career. I can’t afford that kind of kindness. From now on, you can have all of it. I don’t want it.” Liam’s eyes go wide, his hand flying to his cheek. “Chloe, are you crazy? You just hit me.” I give him a withering look. “I’m hitting a fool who can’t think for himself.” Mia throws herself between us, her arms spread wide. “Chloe, no! It’s all my fault. I’m the idiot, I’m the one who messes everything up. Hit me if you want, but don’t blame Liam!” I let out a short, sharp laugh. “You want me to hit you? Fine. I’ll grant your wish.” And I slap her, the sound cracking through the humid air. Liam explodes. He shoves me, hard. I lose my footing on the wet tile and go down, my arm slamming against the edge of the concrete bleachers. A sharp, searing pain shoots up to my shoulder, and a dark bruise is already blooming on my skin. I gasp, sucking in a breath through my teeth. A few of the other swimmers flinch, frowning at Liam. “Dude, what are you doing? What if she’s hurt? The championships are tomorrow.” Liam just glares down at me, unmoved. “She started it. She hit me and Mia first.” I laugh again, the sound raw in my throat. “One of them tried to get me disqualified, and the other—my boyfriend—defended her. You’re damn right I hit you. Both of you.” Liam’s face flushes with anger. “Chloe, what the hell are you talking about?” I’m done. I’m done with this conversation, done with him. “Liam, as of this second, we’re over. You and Mia are perfect for each other. Have a great life.” His jaw drops. He looks at me, incredulous. “You’re breaking up with me? Over this? You’re going to regret this, Chloe.” I just scoff, grabbing my swim bag and turning my back on him without another word. The next day, I arrive at the arena. Our team’s relay is the tenth event. As we’re warming up on the pool deck, Mia comes over with a tray of water bottles. “I filled everyone’s up!” she announces cheerfully. The others thank her, taking their bottles. She turns to me, her smile faltering just a little. “Chloe, I couldn’t find your bottle. Where is it? I can go fill it for you.” This was her opening in the last life. The simple, helpful offer that led to my ruin. “Not necessary,” I say flatly. Her eyes immediately start to glisten. “Are you still mad about yesterday, Chloe?” Liam materializes at her side, wrapping a possessive arm around her. “It’s not your fault, Mia. You were just being nice. Chloe doesn’t know how to appreciate it. This water you got me is great. We’re going to win this thing.” Mia blushes, smiling shyly. “I know you will. Good luck, everyone!” Right before we’re called to the blocks, I pull out my own water bottle. As I raise it to my lips, I see it. A faint trace of white powder clinging to the rim of the mouthpiece. My hand trembles. I was so careful. I guarded everything. And still, she found a way. If I had taken that drink, I’d be walking right back into the same nightmare. I look up and meet Mia’s eyes across the deck. She’s staring at me intently. “Chloe, drink up! Your event is about to start.” I screw the cap back on tightly. “Not thirsty. I need to hit the restroom, you guys go on ahead.” Inside the bathroom stall, a strange sense of panic washes over me. Something still feels wrong. Like I’ve missed a step. Thirty minutes later, the race is over. As expected, our relay team took first place. We all just secured a twenty-point academic boost for our grad school applications. The team is ecstatic, a tangle of wet limbs and joyful screams. “We did it! I knew we could do it!” Right in the middle of our celebration, two officials in polo shirts approach our group. “Excuse me, which one of you is Chloe?” Everyone turns to look at me. I step forward. “I’m Chloe. What’s this about?” The official gives me a stern look. “We’ve received a report that you used a banned substance before the competition. Please come with us for testing.” I feel a cold knot form in my stomach as I follow them away. My teammates look at me, their smiles gone, replaced by anxiety. “Chloe, you didn’t, did you? This was a team effort.” I shake my head. “No. I didn’t take anything.” They look relieved, but the seed of doubt has been planted. I go with the officials. They take blood and urine samples. An hour later, the results are in. The lead official holds the report, his face grim as he addresses the event coordinator. The coordinator’s voice booms over the PA system, silencing the arena. “Due to a positive test for a banned stimulant from team member Chloe, the first-place finish for Northwood University is hereby disqualified. Furthermore, Chloe is banned from all future competitions, effective immediately.” My body goes numb. How? I didn’t drink the water. How is it in my system? Every eye in the arena is on me. Liam storms over, his face contorted with rage, and slaps me across the face. “You cheated, Chloe? You actually took something? Do you have any idea what you’ve just done? You’ve destroyed everything we worked for!” Other teammates grab at my arms. “How could you do this to us, Chloe? We trained for a year, day in and day out, and you threw it all away!” The crowd in the stands starts yelling. “If you can’t win clean, don’t compete! Cheater!” “What a disgrace to our school!” “Get her out of here! I’m writing to the dean. We don’t want scum like you ruining our reputation!” People start throwing empty cups and programs down at me from the stands. I clench my fists, my voice shaking but clear as I look at the event coordinator. “I don’t accept this result.” Mia rushes to my side, her face a mask of patronizing concern. “Chloe, don’t make it worse. Just admit it. If you apologize, maybe we can all ask them to be lenient.” I let out a cold, humorless laugh. “I have nothing to apologize for. I didn’t break any rules.” Liam points a finger in my face. “The test results are right there! Are you still going to lie? First you cheat, now you won’t even own up to it? You’ve humiliated this entire team!” The event coordinator looks at me, annoyed. “On what grounds do you not accept the result?” A small smile plays on my lips. “Because I didn’t swim in the race.”
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