
My whole class got sucked into a "Simp Battle Royale." [Rule 1: All simps must die.] [Rule 2: Expose a simp to survive.] Upon hearing this, the class president immediately pointed at the drama club president. "I report her! Her boyfriend got caught cheating multiple times, and she forgave him every single time. I have the chat logs right here!" The drama club president looked shocked, opening her mouth to argue, but—pop—she instantly dropped dead. A golden "Immunity Token" materialized in the class president's hand. Seeing this, chaos erupted. Everyone started pointing fingers, screaming accusations. The classroom turned into a bloodbath. I watched, heart pounding in my throat. Suddenly, my roommate's ex-boyfriend raised his hand and pointed straight at me. "I report Leeann! She's a huge simp too! She deserves to die!" 1. My heart skipped a beat. "What are you talking about? I don't even have a boyfriend! How can I be a simp?" But Brad, my roommate Jessica's ex, glared at me with pure hatred. "I don't care! I'm reporting her!" The system paused for a moment before pinging: [Reporter, please submit evidence.] Brad's eyes widened in confusion. "Evidence? No one said I needed evidence!" The next second, Brad exploded. Literally. Blood splattered everywhere. Jessica screamed, a high-pitched wail of terror as she watched her ex turn into a red mist. System: [Reporters must provide evidence. False accusations result in immediate termination.] The room froze. People who were about to blindly accuse others slowly lowered their hands. Jessica stared at the spot where Brad used to be, dazed. I reached out to comfort her, but she slapped my hand away. "This is all your fault! If it wasn't for you, he wouldn't be dead!" Jessica screamed, her face twisted with hate. "We broke up because you told me to! And now he's dead because of you!" "You ruined everything!" Her accusations hit me like a bucket of ice water. We were classmates. Jessica and I were roommates. Back then, she was the one constantly complaining about him to us. "Brad is so annoying! I don't get what's going on with him and his ex!" "I checked his phone yesterday. He's liking all her posts again." "No DMs, but who knows if he deleted them?" We'd try to offer advice, but she’d instantly defend him. "But I know Brad. He's a good guy deep down. Nothing happened." After a few rounds of this, we learned to shut up. But two days later, she'd be throwing her phone again. "Ugh! He met up with his ex yesterday!" "He said it was just lunch, nothing else." "Should I believe him?" Knowing her pattern, we stayed silent. Every time she complained, she’d turn around and make up with him, making us look like the bad guys for doubting their "true love." But silence wasn't enough for her. She grabbed my arm, forcing me to look at her. "Leeann, tell me! Should I break up with him?" I saw she was still on a voice call with Brad. I didn't dare say anything definitive. "I don't know... it's between you two. Just think it over carefully." "Think it over?" Brad's furious voice boomed from the phone. "Think about what? Breaking up?" "Leeann, you snake! You just can't stand to see other people happy!" "You'd love it if we broke up, wouldn't you?" I was screaming internally. I never said break up! I said think about it! Jessica couldn't win the argument with him, so she hung up and cried all night. Our dorm took turns comforting her until dawn. The next day, we all looked like zombies with dark circles under our eyes. And Jessica? She put on a full face of makeup and went on a date with him. We were speechless. But then, the cycle repeated. Jessica came back broken again. She was fine during the day, but the moment the clock struck midnight, the waterworks started. She cried for a month. None of us slept. Eventually, we learned Brad dumped her to chase his ex again. He failed, obviously. Now all three of them were miserable. But Jessica didn't blame Brad. She blamed us for the breakup. She probably told Brad we forced her to break up with him. That's why Brad hated me enough to try and kill me to save himself. And now Jessica was screaming, "You killed my boyfriend! You pay for this!" I looked at her, my heart turning cold. If she was going to be ruthless, so was I. I spoke to the System. "I report Jessica. Her boyfriend was emotionally cheating with his ex, and she knew but pretended not to see it." "Even after he dumped her, she tried to get back together." "Check her chat logs with him. It's all there." Under her terrified gaze, I smiled. "I won't tell you to break up this time." "Go be with him in hell. Forever." System: [Audit passed.] In a flash, Jessica dropped dead. 2. A golden Immunity Token appeared in my hand. I looked around. Out of forty students, less than twenty were left. Some died for being simps. Others died for failing to report one. Listening to the reasons, I realized my classmates' love lives were a mess. Amidst the carnage, I gripped my token tight. In this game, being a gossip queen was a survival skill. Being out of the loop was deadly. Take Sarah, the rich girl who spent every holiday traveling and ignored everyone. She was panicking. She stood there, teeth clenched, thinking hard. Finally, she spoke up. "I report myself! I'm a simp!" "I always fall for deadbeats, spend all my money on them, and get cheated on." "Even after breaking up, I beg them to come back." Sarah pulled out her bank transfer records. "Here's the proof!" Everyone froze. Is she suicidal? Seeing our confusion, Sarah smiled nervously. "There's a bug, don't you see?" "Simps must die. But reporting a simp grants life." "If I report myself, the merit cancels out the sin, right? I survive!" The System paused, seemingly processing this logic. In the terrifying silence, several others who couldn't find anyone to report followed her lead and reported themselves. A second later, they all—including Sarah—exploded. System: [Repeating Rule 1: All simps must die. Immediately.] Boom. Only fifteen people left. We looked at each other in horror. Once identified as a simp, it was instant death. No loopholes. 3. The remaining fifteen of us were ushered into the next round. My Immunity Token vanished. System: [Round 2: Multiple Choice.] [Identify which of the following statements indicates a true breakup.] [A. We're done. I will never get back with him. If I take him back, I'm a dog.] [B. This time it's real. Trust me. This is absolutely the last time. We are completely over.] [C. We broke up. He said he doesn't love me anymore.] [Please choose.] The class president, Chloe, spoke first. "Easy. 'Shortest answer is usually right.' It's C. Plus, C sounds dead inside. Probably real." The vice president, Mark, disagreed. "This isn't the SATs, Chloe. No patterns here." "I think it's B. The tone is so firm. Definitely real." The academic decathlon winner, David, shrugged. "I could argue A is the most sincere because it's the longest. I choose A." Bella, the class beauty with the most dating experience, laughed. "At a time like this, just look at the content." "What do you mean?" Chloe frowned. Bella didn't answer. She turned to the System. "Can I choose now?" System: [Yes.] Bella said something confidently. We saw her lips move, but no sound came out. The System muted her. We couldn't cheat by copying. [Answer correct. Proceed to next level.] Bella vanished. That was correct? The rest of us exchanged glances. "What did she pick?" Mark asked. No one knew. The gym jock, Mike, waved his hand. "There are only three options. Let's just brute force it." "At worst, two people die. The rest survive." Easy to say, but who volunteers to be the canary in the coal mine? Silence. Mike grit his teeth. "Nobody? Fine." He turned to a quiet kid in the corner, Tom. "You go." Tom was poor and Mike bullied him often. Usually, Mike would pay him off afterwards, so Tom endured it. "If you try it, I'll pay for your sister's college tuition," Mike promised. Tom's eyes lit up. He hesitated. His sister was in high school. College was expensive. Mike was rich. "Five seconds," Mike said coldly. "If you don't, I'll sue you for all the money I gave you before." Carrot and stick. Tom turned pale. He couldn't pay that back. "Five, four, three..." "I'll do it!" Tom cried. "I choose C." "The simpler the statement, the heavier the meaning. I think C is right." He summoned the System. His lips moved silently. System: [Answer incorrect. Immediate termination.] Tom's eyes bulged in terror. He looked at Mike one last time, hoping he'd keep his promise. Then he was gone. Mike patted his chest, relieved it wasn't him. He forced another student to try. That student picked A. "The longest one has the most detail!" System: [Incorrect.] Dead. Mike grinned. "So the answer is B." 4. He summoned the System with total confidence. "I choose." He spoke his answer. To everyone's shock, the System boomed: [Answer incorrect. Immediate termination.] Mike exploded. "Impossible!" Chloe screamed. "We tried all three options!" David was sweating bullets. "They were muted when they chose." "Maybe one of them lied about what option they picked? Maybe they tried to trick us?" "We might have been played." Panic set in. According to David, everyone before us was unreliable. Only Mike seemed honest because he thought he had the answer key. So B is definitely wrong. It's still a 50/50 shot between A and C. David wanted to force more people to test, but the muting made it useless. We'd never know what they actually picked. We had to guess blind. Mark frowned. "Screw it. I'm picking." Several others followed suit, unwilling to overthink it. They all died. Chloe looked confused. "This doesn't make sense. Statistically, someone should have picked the right one by luck." She lowered her head, thinking. Suddenly, her brow cleared. "I know." She spoke to the System. [Answer correct. Proceed to next level.] Chloe vanished. Watching her leave, I remembered Bella's words: "Just look at the content." I finally understood. "System, I'm ready to choose."
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