After my rebirth, when Julian's little secretary, Chloe, once again "accidentally" spilled red wine on my face while pouring me a drink, giggling like it was a joke. I didn't slap her like I did in my past life. I didn't scream for a divorce like a shrew when Julian rushed to defend her. Instead, I smiled calmly at Julian. "She's really cute. Have fun playing with her." "Let's consider our seventh anniversary celebration over early. I'm going home." With that, I grabbed my bag and walked out of the private room without looking back. I had no choice. After divorcing Julian in my last life, my life was a living hell. He crushed me like a business rival, gripping his assets so tight I couldn't get a cent. I hired every lawyer in the city, but all I got in the divorce settlement was literally $7.50. Right after the divorce, I was diagnosed with cancer. When the pain became unbearable, I swallowed my pride and knelt before Julian. But he let his secretary slap me three times and didn't give me a penny. In the end, penniless and broken, I froze to death on the doorstep of the home I had lived in for seven years. So, dignity? Dignity is nothing compared to staying alive. 1 I didn't expect Julian to chase after me. He grabbed my arm. "Let me explain, Sarah. Chloe is just young and playful. She spilled the wine to lighten the mood, to make you laugh." "She doesn't have bad intentions. We grew up together, she's always been mischievous. She treats you like family, so she sometimes forgets boundaries. Don't hold a grudge against her." Julian said these exact words in my past life. Back then, humiliated by the wine dripping down my face and shaking with rage, hearing him defend her so tenderly was the last straw. I slapped him in front of all our friends, screamed "Divorce!", and ran out. I was so stupid then. I thought threatening divorce would scare him. Instead, I walked for four hours in the freezing winter rain, tears streaming down my face. My heels rubbed my feet raw until they bled. I ended up with a 104-degree fever. While I lay dying in our empty house, Julian didn't call once. That very night, he took Chloe on an overseas business trip. Photos of him adjusting her spaghetti strap dress and her kissing his cheek even made it onto the company gossip forums. The irony was too much. A cynical smile tugged at the corner of my mouth. The next second, Julian angrily shook off my hand. "How many times do I have to tell you? Chloe is the daughter of my dad's friend. I'm just looking out for her." "It's just a little wine spill. Go home and wash it off. Can you stop being jealous over nothing and imagining things between us?" Seeing the sudden anger on his face, a bitterness rose in my chest. Not for him, but for my past self. In my last life, after the divorce, I got pancreatic cancer—the king of cancers. Every day was either nurses poking me with long needles until I cried, or rolling on the floor clutching my stomach, begging for death to come faster. When I ran out of money, I even stabbed myself with a fruit knife, hoping the pain would distract me enough to sleep. Yet even then, I couldn't bear to sell our wedding ring for pain meds. When the doctor gave me a month to live, I dragged my skeletal body to find him, hoping to reconcile. After all, when my parents died, he swore he'd be with me forever. I knelt before the security guard at our old home, begging him to call Julian. When Julian picked up, he heard my voice and said calmly: "Sarah, we're divorced. Divorce means we have nothing to do with each other. Don't contact me again." He hung up. I collapsed in the backyard of the villa where we lived for seven years. In the final moments of my life, I saw him holding Chloe in the house I had lovingly decorated, drinking from the wine glasses I bought, having a romantic date. The pain in my chest was suffocating. I didn't want to remember anymore. I quickly hid my emotions and smiled calmly. "Julian, I'm really not jealous. And I'm really not angry at Chloe." "I'm just tired and want to go home. You should go back inside." Surprise flashed across Julian's face. Before he could react, I turned and walked away down the street without a backward glance. 2 As soon as I got home, I went straight to my room. I called the hospital and booked an appointment with a specialist for a full checkup tomorrow. Whether in the past life or this one, I really want to live. Just as I hung up, Julian suddenly came back. I don't know why. He loosened his tie impatiently. "What did you mean back there on the street?" "Sarah, can you stop throwing attitude for no reason?" Ever since Chloe became his secretary, Julian had become incredibly harsh towards me. He found fault with everything I did. His attitude change and Chloe's provocations were why I acted crazy in my last marriage. I endured the suffocating pain in my chest and turned around calmly. "Julian, believe it or not, I'm not angry. I'm not being unreasonable, and I'm not throwing attitude." "Look, I've already washed my face. I'm not mad at you, and I certainly wouldn't dare be mad at Chloe." With that, I ignored him, went into the bathroom, and locked the door. When I came out, he was gone. Instead, my phone started buzzing non-stop. It was Chloe's habit. Whenever she was with Julian, she would spam me with photos of their life together. She treated me like her personal cloud storage. In my last life, this made me cry or scream at Julian constantly. But now, looking at the photos, I didn't curse her. Instead, I replied earnestly: "Your angle is off. Julian's side profile is better. Hold the phone higher next time." "Also, crop the photo tighter. Less background makes you look more intimate." As soon as I sent it, Chloe replied: "Did you get hacked?" I sent a smiley face. "No. Just letting you know, you can have him." Then I blocked her. This triangular property relationship works for me. I want the title of Mrs. Thorne and the supplementary credit card. Julian's body and heart? Chloe can have them. Unlike my past self, I'm not stupid enough to want his love anymore. 3 After dealing with Chloe, I lay in bed and closed my eyes. Even though I was reborn, I didn't sleep well. Just like when I had cancer, I kept dreaming of our past. When we were kids, Julian was introverted. His mother, a strict teacher, used to beat him. Often at midnight, while I was asleep, he would still be doing homework in his thick glasses. His mom would stand there with a stick, hitting his back for every mistake. I lived across the street. Seeing him beaten made me pity him. So on the way to school, I would sneak candy into his backpack and whisper, "Julian, eat one when your back hurts." The first time I did it, he turned red and ran away. A hundred meters later, he whispered, "I... I don't eat candy." I waved at him. "Julian, you should talk more. Your voice is nice." After that, it became a habit. The lonely boy started waiting for me in the alley, waiting for his candy. We walked through countless springs, summers, and winters together. When we were 18, Julian became the top student in the county and got into a prestigious university. He awkwardly handed me a slip of paper. "I checked. This college is near mine. Ten minutes walk. Your scores aren't good enough for a bachelor's, but you can do an associate's degree there." I looked at his nervous face. I didn't tell him my parents had already decided to pay for a private university so I could get a bachelor's degree. I secretly changed my application to be near him. My parents gave me a mixed-doubles beating, but I never regretted it. We went to the same city. Away from his mother, Julian blossomed. He got contacts, grew out his buzz cut, and changed his style. He traded plaid shirts for white button-downs and black sneakers for white ones. I didn't know why he changed until I was screaming at a concert for my favorite idol. Julian grabbed me, eyes red. "I changed into the type you like. Can't you like me yet?" The word "like" hit me like a hammer. Even at different schools, I heard of the legend of Julian. The tech god. Freshman year, he led the team to win a national competition. Sophomore year, he got offers from big tech giants. There were even forum posts tracking his "glow up." I thought an ocean separated us, that we'd only ever be friends. But he said he liked me. Thick-skinned as always, I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him without hesitation. We started dating. My life became feeding him bubble tea and desserts. I had no career plans, just planning our dates. Julian's life was on a rocket ship. Graduate school, startup, multiple rounds of funding. By the time he got his PhD, his tech company was top 10 in the industry. My life went the opposite way. I failed the transfer exam to a bachelor's program. After graduation, I lived off Julian. Then my doting parents died in a car crash rushing to see me when I was hospitalized for pneumonia. Orphaned, I cried over their bodies. Julian knelt beside me, ignoring his mother's glare, and swore to take care of me forever. We got married. I had multiple miscarriages. Then he met Chloe. He started disliking me for having no depth. I only knew how to ask what to eat. Chloe could talk about art and the future of the internet with him. Tears soaked my pillow. When I opened my eyes, it was dawn. Just like in my last life, I woke up crying. Julian sent a WeChat message. "Visiting my mom at the nursing home this afternoon." 4 I replied calmly: "Busy today. No time." Julian called immediately. "What are you busy with?" "Sarah, how many times do I have to say it? There's nothing between me and Chloe. Why are you clinging to small things?" A sneer formed on my lips. Since his success, Julian spoke in short, concise sentences. This was the first time he rambled defensively. He was trying to convince himself he hadn't fallen for her, trying to lessen his guilt. My heart ached, but I explained calmly: "Julian, I'm not feeling well. I'm going to the hospital for a checkup. I really can't go." "Also, your mom has a heart condition and hates me. Me not going is better for her health. She likes Chloe, says only Chloe is worthy of you. Why don't you take her?" I genuinely meant it as good advice. But Julian exploded. "Sarah, keep acting out. See where it gets you." He hung up. I listened to the dial tone, smiling bitterly. This is the difference between love and no love. When he loved me, a slight frown from me would make him panic and ask what he did wrong. Now, even my sincere advice is seen as throwing a tantrum.
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